The last movie Shopping Siren saw in the theater: “Sherlock Holmes 2,” a perfect cocktail of mystery, action and attractive pretend-Brits (Robert Downey Jr., happy sigh).
Bag Lady is embarrassed to admit that for her it was “The Green Hornet,” a full 13 months ago. It’s been that kind of year. Plus, the flick was lousy enough to turn anyone off to spending $10 a ticket to see a superhero’s sofa in 3-D.
Joy, then, for DVDs!
Double joy for DVDs at $1.99!
Unfortunately, it’s at the expense of a business closing (one joy demerit). So, we’re back to plain joy. We can handle that.
Blockbuster in the Shaw’s Plaza on East Avenue in Lewiston is nearing the end of its going-out-of-business sale, offering deals on virtually everything needed for a fabulous at-home movie night. DVDs, candy, popcorn, more DVDs, wood-and-metal shelves to display those DVDs . . .
Everything is at a fraction of its original price. And, as of a few days ago, the selection was still great enough to boggle. (Shopping Siren: “They still have 15 copies of the latest ‘Star Trek’ movie? How do they — never mind. One’s mine!”)
So drop by, grab a movie — or two or three — and say goodbye to Blockbuster. We hear its last day will be Feb. 26. Dear video store: We’ll miss you!
* Used DVDs in cases, $1.99
An entire wall, plus a couple of racks to boot. Never got to see “Spider-Man 3” in theaters? Want your own copy of “Bride of Chucky?” Dying to check out “12 Dogs of Christmas” (filmed in Bethel!) or “The A-Team” (not filmed in Bethel! Thankfully.) or “Buried,” with teen-cutie-turned-action-heartthrob Ryan Reynolds? They’re here and less than 2 bucks each. Chances are, if you want it, they have it this week, but we don’t recommend holding out for a sub-$1.99 price. C’mon. There’s bargain hunting, then there’s Cheapy Cheapskate.
* New DVDs, prices vary (50 percent off)
Brand-new, sealed in their cases, with prices around $5 or so. Great for gifts. Try “The Kids are All Right,” or kick it old-school with “Kramer vs. Kramer.” Well. Maybe not if the gift is for Father’s Day.
* Used Blu-ray discs, $1.99
Own your favorite flicks on Blu-ray yet? The perfect price to start building that collection, and ample titles to pick from. “Precious.” “Sex and the City 2.” “Piranha.” So, you know, the whole emotional range.
* New Blu-ray discs, prices vary (also 50 percent off)
Before “The Green Hornet” soured Bag Lady on the theater experience, “Hot Tub Time Machine” ($7.50) nearly had that honor. The title had so much potential! Alas, ick. However, “Role Models” ($7.50), with its unflowery name, rocked.
* Used TV series on regular DVD, $1.99 or $4.99 per season
“Weeds.” “Battlestar Galactica.” “Nurse Betty.” “The Office.” “Family Guy.” “Entourage.” That’s something like a dime per episode and no drawn-out wait of a regular viewing season. Instant gratification all around.
* Used DVDs in sleeves, 5 for $7.50, 10 for $15, or 15 for $22.50
We’re guessing these are the DVDs rented through Blockbuster’s website and sent through the mail. It would explain why they come only in little white sleeves, and why they appear more worn than your average DVD. (Read: scratches.) For the risk-averse, we suggest sliding “Slumdog Millionaire” or “Cirque du Freak” out of its sleeve and taking a quick peek before you buy. Even $1.50 each is too expensive if you can’t watch it.
* Orville Redenbacher microwave popcorn, individual bags, 47 cents
Popcorn and movies. Mmm.
* Candy, 79 cents
Or, should we say, candy! Twizzlers, Dots, M&Ms and more. Some movie nights it doesn’t matter what you watch, only what you nosh.
* Shelves and fixtures, $50 and up
Wood-and-metal, metal-and-metal and presumed Formica. Display your DVDs like you mean it. Fair warning: The sales counter is already marked “sold.” Sorry.
Best find: Used DVDs
Bag Lady scooped up “The Other Guys”: Will Ferrell, Marky Mark, intense action, silly laughs and a backward-driving car chase. Basically, 107 minutes of awesome.
Shopping Siren grabbed “Star Trek” and “Leap Year”: One is a sci-fi/action-adventure while the other is a romantic comedy. Love is in the air . . . and in space.
Think twice: “Sharks in Venice,” $1.99
Starring Stephen Baldwin, this 2008 flick features sharks. In Venice. Also, according to an anonymous summary on IMDb, it involves the long-lost fortune of the Medici, a kidnapping by the Mafia and a race against time. Somehow, we get the feeling this didn’t do well at the box office. If it made it to the box office. Not to disparage either sharks or Mr. Baldwin, but we suggest skipping this movie in favor of something more . . . better. Hey, $1.99 will get you a lot at Blockbuster this week. Aim high. They probably have a few “Star Trek” DVDs left.
Bag Lady and Shopping Siren’s true identities are protected by a pair of stylish, sweater-wearing Doberman pinschers (who dream of starring roles in “12 Dogs of Christmas — the Sequel”) and the Customer Service counter at the Sun Journal. You can reach them at email@example.com and firstname.lastname@example.org.