Bliss Thru Shopping: 'Stranger Things' things

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For the longest time, Shopping Siren resisted the pull of “Stranger Things.” She didn’t have Netflix and didn’t feel inclined to get it just for one show. Even if everyone was raving about that one show. 

Even if Bag Lady was one of the people doing the raving.

Eventually — read: last week — Shopping Siren got Netflix and eventually — read: 12 minutes later — she got her first look at what is now one of her top 10 favorite sci-fi shows ever.

It’s got monster-fighting kids. Theoretical physics explained with stick figures drawn on a paper plate. And the dubious fashion choices of 1983.

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What’s not to love?

We’re not the only ones infatuated, apparently. A Manhattan hotel recently announced a “Stranger Things” theme package complete with Eggo waffles, a Christmas lights tapestry and Netflix, with which to binge-watch Season 2.

Don’t want to spend $249 a night on a strange evening in NYC? We’ve got surefire ways to celebrate Season 2 closer to home.

No, really.

Friends don’t lie.

• 20-inch Brawler bike by Mongoose, Walmart, $99.99

Blacked-out kids’ bike with sturdy tires for off-roading in the woods. No banana seat, but there looked to be just enough room for a couple of young friends to hop on and careen out to the junkyard to hide in an old school bus. Or, you know, just coast around a regular neighborhood with no monsters or intimidating people in fake utility vans.     

• Holiday Time Ultra Bright ceramic Christmas lights, 25-count, Walmart, $6.96

Bright, colorful, in an old-fashioned shape. (Bulbs should be bulbous. No one will change our minds on this.) Lights can be used indoors or out. We recommend indoors, preferably along the ceiling, down the hall and draped artfully around the alphabet you’ve scrawled on your living room wall. Hang and then keep an eye on them, clearly. Who knows who you’ll hear from.

• “Stranger Things” action figures, Spencer’s, $24.99

Each package comes with three figures: Eleven, Lucas and Mike or Will, Dustin and a Demogorgon. Relive your favorite scenes with your own mini characters. Blanket fort not included.

• “Stranger Fillings” parody cookbook, Books-A-Million, $20

High-five to authors The Muffin Brothers for coming up with the concept and high-five to your next dinner party with Barb’s Mystery Dip.

• Eggo homestyle waffles, 24-pack, Walmart, $4.88

Eleven’s favorite gnosh — round, crunchy, scientist-free. Should she decide to stray from homestyle, we were shocked at the array of flavors that Eggo has waded into: Chocolately Chip Banana, Mixed Berry Marvel (shaped like spiderwebs), Star Wars Galaxy Adventure buttermilk, thick and fluffy brown sugar cinnamon. Homestyle is so 1983.

• ONN cassette recorder, Walmart, $24.88

Press play for our public service announcement: YOU CAN STILL BUY A CASSETTE RECORDER IN 2017. We now return to your regularly scheduled programming.

• Pathfinder core rule book, hardcover, Zimmie’s Comics, $50

Play roles! Vanquish monsters! Get eaten! No, wait, try not to get eaten. In fact, roll again with:

• 20-sided dice, Zimmie’s Comics, 79 cents

All the numbers you could ever want! Well, 20 of them, anyway. Use for your own 10-hour quest and see where your imagination takes you.

Best find: Cobra walkie-talkies, Walmart, $59/32-mile range or $39/23-mile range.

Is your town sprawling and filled with evil? Go with the 32-mile range.

Clandestine and compact? Then 23-mile it is! Both include rechargeable batteries and foul-weather alerts. Don’t know why you’d need that after the week we’ve had. 

Think twice: About sitting this series out.

It’s addictive. In a good way.

Bag Lady and Shopping Siren’s true identities are protected by a pair of stylish, sweater-wearing Doberman pinschers (who only like upside down when it’s cake) and the Customer Service counter at the Sun Journal. You can reach them at baglady@sunjournal.com and shoppingsiren@sunjournal.com.

“Stranger Things” action figures, $24.99 at Spencer’s. Playtime has never been so strange.

“Stranger Fillings” parody cookbook, $20 at Books-A-Million, includes a recipe for friends don’t li(m)e pie. Of course.

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