Daughter cringes

Daughter cringes when mom does happy dance

DEAR ABBY: I am an 11-year-old girl who loves going shopping and doing various stuff with my mom. But when we go to the mall or stop for lunch and she hears a song she likes, she'll start singing to it. And if we're standing up, she even dances to it a little.

I have tried telling her to stop because she's embarrassing me, but all she says is, "No one is looking, honey." She also does it at home in front of my friends when I play my iPod. Any suggestions? — BLUSHING IN SAN FRANCISCO

Woman's size

Woman's size is no deterrent in search for love

DEAR ABBY: I'm 32 and a "large girl." I am also intelligent, witty and fun to be around. I make friends wherever I go. The problem is my mother — who is also big — keeps telling me that heavy women are not desirable and we must "settle" when it comes to choosing a mate.

My mother has had two long, unhappy marriages. She's always saying I think too highly of myself and my standards for men are out of my reach.

Guilt mars

Guilt mars comfort couple finds in each other's arms

DEAR ABBY: Is there anything wrong with having a lover solely for the purpose of sex? He is grieving for his late wife (my best friend), and I am separated from my husband. We're both lonely and have supported each other through our pain. A few weeks ago we decided to become lovers.

We both have our eyes open, and we don't expect anything out of this except a friendship with benefits. I am satisfying his needs, and he is making me remember the woman I used to be before I was emotionally beaten down by my husband.

Art of letter-writing

Art of letter-writing suffers neglect

DEAR ABBY: Please don't think I'm stupid for asking this, but I need some help. The practice of letter-writing appears to be a dying form because of e-mail and texting — which I'm good at. But when I receive a nice gift, I know the proper way to acknowledge it is to write a thank-you letter.

Can you please tell me how to do one that doesn't come across as awkward? Christmas is coming and this is hard for me. When I try to get my thoughts down on paper, I am ... STUCK!

Men applaud

Men applaud the pleasures of being with older women

DEAR ABBY: In your response to the letter from "'Cougar' in New York" (Sept. 3), you invited your male readers to share their thoughts. Abby, cougars are nothing new. They're simply out of the closet.

Men have been called "dirty old men" for their dalliances with younger women. But older women have quietly involved themselves with younger men for years. As women have become more successful, both in the corporate environment and individually, they have grown bolder in their personal lives.

Wife draws line

Wife draws line in bedroom over smoking

DEAR ABBY: My wife of 25 years, in an effort to get me to stop smoking, refuses to have sex until I quit. It's been more than a year since we made love.

I love my wife with all my heart, and I always will. I plan to stop smoking, but not this way. She will not give in (or give out). I don't want to think of sex as her weapon, but it is. Any advice on how to cope with my unwinnable battle? — DESPERATE IN ARLINGTON, TEXAS

Wonderfully helpful: Out-of-towner gets personal escort to the airport

DEAR ABBY: On a Sunday afternoon in late September, I got hopelessly lost trying to find O'Hare Airport in Chicago. I pulled off the interstate at a neighborhood exit and asked a man parked at the curb for directions. He was Hispanic, and there was a bit of a language barrier, but he and his sister offered to lead me there.

When we neared Midway Airport, I realized the mistake that had happened. They again offered to lead me to O'Hare — which is a considerable distance from Midway.

Teen looks for ammunition

Teen looks for ammunition in battle with peers

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 14-year-old boy. I went to a party last weekend and some people pressured me to do some uncomfortable stuff. Can you advise me — and other teens — how to handle peer pressure? — ASHAMED IN ILLINOIS

After-dark visitor

After-dark visitor next door raises suspicions

DEAR ABBY: My neighbors, "John" and "Marcia," are such a nice couple, I'm not sure what to do. I don't know them all that well, but what's going on is extremely upsetting.

Art of medicine

Art of medicine can require long hours

DEAR ABBY: May I respond to your column regarding excessive waits in doctors' offices (Sept. 1)?

Husband demands

Husband demands more than wife can provide

DEAR ABBY: I am a 38-year-old business woman. I was single for many years until I met and fell in love with "Rory," who had been a long-time client. We were married a year ago.

Rory and I love each other, but we have a problem — or, should I say, I have one. Rory has a penile implant and an insatiable sex drive. I can't keep up with him. He demands sex every night and sometimes a couple of times during the week at lunchtime.

Wife's male friend

Wife's male friend is too close

DEAR ABBY: My wife, "Paula," and I have a friend I'll call "Mark." I recently learned that before our wedding, Mark made a pass at Paula. (He was separated from his wife at the time.) Paula told him she wasn't interested.

I also found out that Paula kissed Mark while we were having some difficulties during the past couple of years. But when Mark and his wife worked things out, he told Paula the behavior had to end.

Time

Time has come to end girl's bathroom bonding

DEAR ABBY: I need an unbiased opinion. I am the father of a 12-year-old daughter, "Lia." She catches an early morning bus for school, and I leave for work at the same time her bus picks her up, so I'm in charge of getting her ready in the morning.

Although we have two bathrooms — one upstairs and one down — neither of us wants to use the downstairs bathroom to get ready. All our stuff is upstairs.

Aging driver: Taxi service solves travel dilemma

DEAR ABBY: Several years ago, I realized that my mother's eyesight and reflexes weren't what they once were, but she insisted on remaining behind the wheel. She was afraid of losing her independence if she gave up driving. Then she had a traffic accident that shook her enough to make her finally relinquish her keys — but she wasn't happy about it.

Teens lie

Teens lie about his past jeopardizes future
DEAR ABBY: I am a 16-year-old guy in my sophomore year of high school. I am known as a friendly, outgoing guy who gets along with girls. My problem is, I used to be one of the biggest jerks who ever was. I was involved in fighting and other things I won't go into. But I turned my life around.

Woman objects

Woman objects to giving cellphone number to boss
DEAR ABBY: My boss wants my cell phone number for "work purposes." He has trouble with limits, and I am reluctant to give it to him. I don't want to receive text messages, unsolicited calls or contact outside of work. My private life is just that — private.
I have kept an unlisted cell number for many years for good reason. I have a home phone and will answer it when the boss calls. I arrive promptly at work, but leave the job there.

Friend in need

Friend in need is repaid with disappointment
DEAR ABBY: Please print this for me on behalf of myself and all the other well-intentioned folks out there who have lent money to others.
''Dear Friend, Family Member or Co-Worker: You came to me in a state of panic — unable to make your car payment, pay your lawyer's fee, your taxes or the light bill. You asked for my help. I gave it to you because I respected and trusted you enough to go out on a limb for you. Please honor your promise to repay me without my having to ask you.

Man wrapped up

Man wrapped up in girlfriend ignores grandpa
DEAR ABBY: My wife and I were visiting our children and grandson, "Rhett," age 24. Rhett is a college student who lives at home. He had his girlfriend, "Peggy," who lives in another town, at the house for the weekend.

Displays of affection

Displays of affection between parents, children win praise
DEAR ABBY: Thank you for your response to "Alarmed in Apple Valley" (Aug. 28), who was concerned because her teenage nephew shows so much affection toward his mother. I raised a very affectionate son who, to this day at age 30, hugs and kisses me no matter where we meet. I raised him with the principle that because he is male does not mean he has to hide his feelings as generations before him did. My daughter-in-law tells me often that she could not ask for a better husband and father to her children.

Mom longs to have empty nest

Mom longs to have empty nest to herself
DEAR ABBY: I have a 19-year-old daughter, "Caitlin," whom I love very much. Despite a few rocky periods, we have a great relationship.
Caitlin moved in with her fiance shortly after she turned 18, and they were married a few months ago. After she left, I went through an "empty nest" period because it was the first time I was alone in 18 years.

Has special meaning: Woman uncomfortable mouthing 'I love you'

 DEAR ABBY: I have strong feelings about the word "love." I use it only when I truly mean it. My husband's family, however, bandies it about as a common word.

How does one respond when someone says "I love you" when you know he or she doesn't mean it and is only saying it as a pleasantry? I hate saying it back to someone I don't really love. I feel the phrase should be reserved only when you are saying it from the heart. Any advice on what I should say, if anything at all? — KEEPING MUM IN MISSISSIPPI

Don't forget the batteries

Don't forget those batteries when 'falling back'
DEAR ABBY: As a fire officer, I have seen far too many families fall victim to accidental home fires. It is devastating to find out that a life could have been saved if someone had only taken that simple step of replacing a dead battery in a smoke alarm. Nearly 96 percent of American homes have at least one smoke alarm. But did you know that 19 percent of American homes lack a working smoke alarm because the batteries are missing or dead?

Multitasking daughter

Multitasking daughter is driving to disaster
DEAR ABBY: My daughter insists that she's a "multitasker" -- too busy to telephone or text except when she's driving. It scares me to be in the passenger seat while she's talking on the phone or picking up toys the baby has dropped from his car seat.
I told her I won't talk to her while she's driving because I don't want to be a party to an accident she might be involved in, so she has stopped calling me altogether.

Special-needs children

Special-needs children require special parents
DEAR ABBY: On Aug. 10 you printed a letter from an aunt who was upset because her sister, the mother of a child with autism, doesn't have time to join in fundraising with her and the rest of the family. While I commend the writer and her family for raising money for autism research, that woman needs to cut her sister some slack.

Woman's predatory boss

Woman's predatory boss is eager to score
DEAR ABBY: I attended a business-related function with my boss and some co-workers. I had way too much to drink and ended up having sex with my boss. (He offered me a ride to my car and took advantage of me.) If I had been sober, it would never have happened.