DEAR ABBY: A wonderful man, “Frank,” said he was interested in developing a relationship. The problem? He is a super neat freak. A person could live in his garage — it’s THAT clean. The floor is spotless and everything is in its place. Frank washes and shines his car every second day. When there is a delivery to his house, he makes the delivery people remove their shoes before entering.
I’m neat, but not to that extreme. When I’m at Frank’s house, I am on pins and needles if I leave a glass on a table that might leave a ring and terrified I’ll drop something on his carpet. Frank has never said anything, but I wonder what he’s thinking.
I like Frank a lot, but when he comes to my apartment, I notice his 360-degree gaze around the rooms. Another possible problem — he has no interest in culture or the arts. Am I right in seeing more minuses than pluses in such a relationship? — NEAT ENOUGH IN PENNSYLVANIA
DEAR NEAT ENOUGH: If what you want from the relationship is just friendship, I don’t see a problem. However, if you’re looking for more than that, then I’m afraid my answer is yes — to which I’ll add one more “minus”: your inability to discuss your misgivings with HIM.
DEAR ABBY: Recently, I went to the funeral of a family member. As we were leaving the chapel, a relative asked me if I was aware that the funeral had been live streamed. I was appalled. After all, going to a funeral allows us a chance to say goodbye to the deceased and to be there to support the surviving family and friends. I don’t believe that live streaming can accomplish either of those missions. Am I wrong to think that this was really inappropriate? — BAFFLED IN BOSTON
DEAR BAFFLED: You may be passing judgment too quickly. These days many funerals and memorials are live streamed, but are not available to the general public. To view them, one needs an access code.
While I agree that the purpose of a funeral is to comfort the living (as well as pay respects to the deceased), what you haven’t taken into account is that there may be individuals who may be unable to attend. It could be that the airfare is more than some relatives can afford, or that health problems make travel difficult. In some cases, streaming the service or memorial is a practical solution so that everyone can be included.
DEAR ABBY: A new family moved down the street. They have two young kids who take the bus with my son. What is annoying to me is their daughters are always late for the bus, which makes the bus late to school. Should I say something or let it go? In all the years my son has taken the bus, this is the first time this has happened. Thanks for the advice. — LATE FOR SCHOOL IN OHIO
DEAR LATE: Talk to your son’s teacher, because his tardiness to class could reflect poorly on his grades. The teacher — or school principal — might send a note to the parents “reminding” them that children must be in their classrooms by a certain time, that the bus schedule is fixed and cannot be adjusted to accommodate each student, and if it continues to happen, the driver will have to leave without their daughters.
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