DEAR ABBY: I’m 16 and have grown up religious my whole life. I get good grades and stay out of trouble. A lot of my friends have done crazy things like drinking and partying, but I haven’t. Because of this, I have the reputation of being a “goody-two-shoes.”
I’m not saying it’s a bad thing being a good girl, but I don’t want to be a goody-two-shoes. Part of me wants to try some of the stuff my friends have been doing, but I don’t want to lose my parents’ trust. Please help! — RESTLESS IN OREGON
DEAR RESTLESS: You have your parents’ trust because you have earned it. Before you try any of the “stuff” your friends have been doing, ask yourself what the consequences could be. Yes, it’s hard being labeled a goody-two-shoes — but please look closely at who is doing the name-calling. A streetwise individual once told me, “The best way out of a jam is not to get into one in the first place.” That tidbit has served me well, and that’s why I’m passing it along to you.
DEAR ABBY: My daughter left our small Midwestern town for the West Coast to marry money. At 37, she finally snagged her millionaire. She thought it was going to give her a blank check.
She does live in a lovely home and drives an expensive foreign car, but that’s where it ends. Everything is in his name, and her wedding ring is one we gave her, although he paid to remove the stone and have it polished. I told her then to walk away.
They have two children. Her son is a spoiled brat, completely self-absorbed like his dad. Her daughter has learning disabilities and is still at home.
More than one family member refers to her spouse as a horse’s rear end. He rarely attends family events, which is really fine with everyone. At best, he can be described as rude and obnoxious.
My daughter would never leave him. She loves the lifestyle too much. If she only knew how most of her extended family think of them. I’m embarrassed by it, really.
I just thought your readers should know that marrying money isn’t necessarily the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. — HER MOM IN WISCONSIN
DEAR MOM: I’ll say. Someone who marries for money usually ends up earning every single penny.
DEAR ABBY: My husband was recently invited to the wedding of one of his co-workers. The wedding is in Mexico. Shouldn’t these types of invitations be issued to family and very close friends only? I can’t help but feel she is just looking for a gift. Is this proper, or am I “seeing” the bigger picture? — ANNOYED IN ILLINOIS
DEAR ANNOYED: No, and there are a few things wrong with this “picture.” If the co-worker knows your husband is married, the invitation should have properly been addressed to “Mr. and Mrs.” Since it wasn’t, and I assume your husband has no intention of attending, he should send his regrets.
However, because the bride is someone he will be interacting with on an ongoing basis, the politic way to handle this would be to present the happy couple with a token gift from both of you upon their return — although you are not socially obligated to do so.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.