This week, less shopping, more snakes. But still, a little bit of shopping:
So Bag Lady happened upon a snake in the basement last week and didn't freak out. For real. It was the size of a pencil, lethal as a paperclip and stock still (all scream-relevant factors). Judging by its parka, the little guy was probably looking for a home for the winter. I'm trying to remain chill about the prospect.
Who am I fooling? I have the willies just typing this. But the snake doesn't know that, and it's all about the appearance of maintaining the upper hand.
I KNOW YOU'RE THERE AND COULDN'T CARE LESS, SNAKE.
But if you want to shuffle along, that's cool, too. I hear Shopping Siren's basement is fantastic this time of year.
A less than total snooze
Bag Lady needs to propose a midcourse correction on one of my 2012 New Year's resolutions. The resolution was to go lights out by 10 p.m. at least twice a week. Not happening, not going to happen, officially ceasing to knock myself out trying. I've recently read that seven hours of sleep is fine, too. Maybe seven is the new eight, much like 40 is the new 30. Er. Or something like that. Silly math.
My other two resolutions (exercise three times a week, organize my closet and basement) are works in progress. The latter may have run into some, um, complications.
Oh, my. I just heard a parka brush against the oil tank.
STILL DON'T CARE.
I cheer, you cheer
We've been flirting for a few months now about writing a column on our current favorite things under $5 and Bag Lady has two that need shouting from the rooftops:
* Peanut butter Cheerios, 11.3 oz., Hannaford, $2.99
Have you tasted these yet? Amazing. For real.
* Kleenex Wallet Packs, 10 tissues, CVS, 69 cents*
Ingenious little plastic packs that fold in half, wallet-style, with five fully-ensconced tissues tucked into either side. It's all about the ensconcing: Traditional travel packs with the one open slit on top that you toss into your purse? That top tissue is always ratty from banging up against your car keys, lipstick and personal flotsam. No more.
(* They were 69 cents as of my receipt dated July 17. Now that I've written about them, I finally get to use them! C'mere, you little three-ply.)
Go Dmitry, go!
Anyone else watching "Project Runway"? I went into this 10th season adrift, not sure whom to root for . . . and then came Dmitry Sholokhov. He's talented, dryly funny and just catty enough.
Heading into this week, the pack of fashion designers was down to the final five competing for three slots in the show's runway finale. My fingers, toes and snakes are crossed.
Bag Lady's true identity is protected by a pair of stylish, sweater-wearing Doberman pinschers (who also delight in peanut butter Cheerios) and the Customer Service counter at the Sun Journal. You can reach her at firstname.lastname@example.org.