Dear Abby
Best birthday
DEAR ABBY: "49 and Holding" (Dec. 5), who doesn't want her daughter to give her a 50th birthday party, needs to grow up and learn to celebrate life instead of hiding from the fact that she's growing older. She is aging because she's alive — and what a blessing that is.
I lived through the worst years of the AIDS epidemic and witnessed the deaths of more than 200 friends — all of whom would have loved to celebrate a 50th birthday. My mother died at 82 and was grateful for every year, as am I.
Life's milestones warrant a party. Those who don't want to celebrate life and the birthdays that come with it should consider the alternative. — BRUCE C., ATLANTA
DEAR BRUCE: My readers agreed that "Holding" should quit whining and enjoy life because everyone isn't so fortunate. Growing old is a gift, and it sure does beat the alternative! Read on:
DEAR ABBY: Sorry, 50 is NOT the new 30. Fifty is 50! One of the reasons "Holding" may have issues with aging is this obsession with youth. Youth is definitely transitory, but that doesn't mean one's health, beauty and vibrancy vanish. "Holding" has every right to feel as she does, but I hope she won't continue sitting on the sidelines of life.
By the way, I'll be celebrating my 51st birthday in a few days. My daughter is taking me to Las Vegas to paint the town ... not red (too youthful) but crimson. You definitely DO get better as you age! — JACQUELINE W., CHANDLER, ARIZ.
DEAR ABBY: I admit that I felt much as "Holding" did until my sister told me that, for her, turning 50 was an exceptionally freeing experience. It's true. At that age, I realized I wasn't going to be the CEO of the company I worked for, that I had a job I enjoyed, that my family was there for me in whatever I chose to pursue, and that there were places on this planet I wanted to visit (and have). I have found it difficult finding a downside to being 50.
Age is in your head, Abby. I've met 10-year-olds who are eons past 50, and 70-year-olds who are as curious, inquisitive and active as people far younger. So I say, go for it proudly. — PAST 50 AND FABULOUS
DEAR ABBY: Everyone regards aging differently, but why be depressed over something you can't control? When I turned 50, I decided I could either be depressed and drink myself silly or celebrate the milestone.
I declared to my family, friends and co-workers that it was my year and my goal was to do 50 things I had never done before — or hadn't done in a long time. I reconnected with neglected friends, went on my first cruise, stayed in a haunted hotel. While I didn't quite make it to 50 things (I made it to 30), it was fun trying, and everyone had a blast in the process. — 50-PLUS AND DEALING WITH IT
DEAR ABBY: At 36 I was diagnosed with cancer. My son was only 5. As radiation treatments pulsed through my body in the hope of giving me more life, I wondered if those would be his last memories of me.
Fast forward 13 years. I am 49 and holding — with one major difference. I look forward to each and every birthday. In a few months, I'll turn 50. And do you know what looks even better than my 50th birthday? My 60th!
Birthdays are a celebration of life, a reminder that we have the good fortune to be with the people who mean the most to us. — THANKFUL FOR EACH AND EVERY DAY
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement
Most Popular Today
- LePage's communications director stepping down
- Lawmakers endorse bipartisan deal on immediate DHHS shortfall
- All the Goodwill stuff you didn’t think you wanted, now by the pound in Gorham
- Prosecutors describe Missouri teen as "thrill killer"
- 15 Colby students cited in investigation for sexual misconduct
verified on "P. Nachman: Confidence probably misplaced"
Would the SJ please
Would the SJ please investigate why this person is writing to the editor. Is he some shill being paid by the RNC?
verified on "Turning back the clock on social care"
Why don't you champion the
Why don't you champion the legislature to RESCIND the massive tax cut they adopted during the last session that lead to the mess. Come on, Judy, is your caviar that important to you?
verified on "School choice, public funding for religious institutions headline LePage education plan"
I approve of most of this
I approve of most of this plan. The school choice initiative seems to be done in a fairly safe manner that will have more positive effects than negative ones for schools and students.
However, the state government has NO business in providing funding to religious schools. It's a shame this exists as a massive blemish in an otherwise sound set of reforms.
In order to make comments, you must verify your account.
In order to comment on SunJournal.com, you must use your real name and include the town in which you live in your profile. A member of our staff will call you to verify this information. To join in, fill out your user profile completely and check the box "please verify my status." We'll get back to you within one business day to verify your account.
Login or create an account here.
Our policy prohibits comments that are:
- Defamatory, abusive, obscene, racist, or otherwise hateful
- Excessively foul and/or vulgar
- Inappropriately sexual
- Baseless personal attacks or otherwise threatening
- Contain illegal material, or material that infringes on the rights of others
- Commercial postings attempting to sell a product/item
If you violate this policy, your comment will be removed and your account may be banned.