When Monica Noda started planning her nuptials several months ago, she was shocked at the cost of festive matrimony.

She wanted a live band and tasty food at the tony Madison Hotel in Morristown, N.J. So, she had to cut corners somewhere - such as holding the reception on a Friday instead of Saturday to save $40 a person.

Noda also saved money by selecting July for her reception, instead of May or June. She chose inexpensive invitations and made the programs, table cards and wedding favors herself. Relatives pitched in to make a Brazilian coconut chocolate dessert for her 180 guests.

Many brides this year have learned the true meaning of compromise as they plan their special day in a tight economy and pay for the wedding of their dreams with a down-to-earth bank account. They are doing everything from bringing MP3 players to substitute for DJs at receptions to cutting out limousines and making table centerpieces themselves.

The cost of getting married has steadily risen from $22,360 in 2002 to $27,852 last year, according to Brides magazine. Couples are also paying for more of the wedding.

More people also are using silk flowers, which can be half the price of real ones, said Marrion Pratscher, owner of Exotic Flowers & More in Edison, N.J. A silk lilly costs about $4, compared with $10 for a real one, she said.

One item brides don't skimp on is the gown.

"The gown is highly important, and it's one place people will go shopping around," said Millie Martini Bratten, editor of Brides magazine.

Noda, who got married July 18, fell in love with a dress that cost $4,500, which was out of her price range. She scoured other stores until she found a stunning gown with a sweetheart neckline for about half the price.

Gowns typically cost between $1,000 and $4,000, said Donna Morello, owner of Mariage Couture, the bridal shop where Noda bought her gown. However, brides save some money with so-called destination gowns, such as a clingy chiffon sheath with a low back. If a destination dress is too simple, brides can embellish it by having a seamstress sew crystal along the neckline or the shoulder straps or add pearls "or some pretty appliqué to capture the bride's personality, if she likes different embroidery," Morello said.

Reception: Save 15 percent by choosing Friday or Sunday. Have the ceremony and reception in the same place, and some hotels will give the bride and groom a free room.

Unopen bar: Serve beer, wine and one specialty drink to slash the liquor bill.

Semiformal: Ditch the tuxedo and gown for a terrific suit and a great dress. The bridal party can cut costs with the off-the-rack look.

Gown: Some frugal brides can rent gowns, instead of paying thousands for one they'll wear only once.

Flowers: Use a mixture of candles and flowers as centerpieces, instead of flower vases. Also, silk flowers can be half the price of real ones.

Favors: Forgo the favors, which can range in price from $1 to $23 each.

Cake: Order a small cake for pictures and a sheet cake for guests. Ask your local vocational school if student chefs make wedding cakes.

Music: Use MP3 players for small cocktail receptions. For larger affairs, hire a DJ for about $600 to make announcements and get the crowd going.

Invitations: Design and print your own invitations, programs and place cards. Check out theknot.com, brides.com and papermart.com.

Makeup: Have your makeup done by a Mary Kay or MAC beauty consultant for about $70.

Honeymoon: Replace Paris with Montreal for its French cafes and bistros, Bora Bora with Belize for its Mayan ruins and Tuscany with Portugal for its old world cuisine. Also consider Vietnam, Croatia, Hungary, Costa Rica, Thailand, Argentina and Honduras.

SOURCES: Isis Petrie, Posh Events; Carol Davidson-Toby, theivorywedding.com; Millie Martini Bratten, editor of Brides magazine.