DEAR ABBY: Three months ago, my longtime boyfriend, “Mark,” broke up with me. We had planned to be married. It took me a long time to get back to being my old self.

Right after our breakup, Mark began dating his boss’s daughter. I’ll call her “Carrie.” I accepted it because I care about Mark and want him to be happy.

My problem is, for the past month, Mark has called me frequently in the middle of the night to tell me he “misses me” and how much he “continues to love me.” He’s even said he still wants to marry me.

Every time Mark calls, he invites me to come over and sleep with him. I have refused because of Carrie. I feel sorry for her.

Abby, I cannot imagine being with a man who is still in love with someone else. Should I tell Carrie what Mark is up to – or should I stay out of it? I am awaiting your reply. – MARK’S EX

DEAR EX:
The first thing you should do is fall on your knees and give thanks that you are no longer engaged to this two-timing user. If you are wise, you will stop all contact with him. That said, if you try to warn his boss’s daughter, she will probably interpret it as jealousy and not believe you. She needs to find out about him on her own. And when she does, Mark will be looking for another job and another gullible woman.

DEAR ABBY: Our family recently attended my daughter’s high school graduation. Seated next to us was a couple who talked to each other during the entire commencement – until the man’s cell phone began ringing. Then he continued to carry on a loud conversation over the phone. Needless to say, it was a major distraction for all of us who were seated near him.

This is not the first time such a thing has happened, and I know it won’t be the last. People who talk while others are trying to listen do not seem to care that they’re disruptive and disrespectful.

This happens everywhere nowadays – church, business meetings, movies and plays. Growing up, I was taught to listen with respect and never interrupt others.

I have tried to politely ask the offender to “keep it down,” or have gotten up and moved to a quieter location, but sometimes it’s impossible.

Has our society gotten so “me-oriented” that we’ve forgotten the common courtesy of being quiet while others are speaking? Maybe you or your readers can share what works for them in order to stay calm during situations like this. – LOSING MY COOL IN LYNCHBURG, VA.

DEAR LOSING MY COOL:
Cell phones are a boon to many people. But used thoughtlessly, they also create very real problems. Of COURSE people should observe the rules of common courtesy and turn them off at public events. And people who converse on their cell phones in public places should remember to do so discreetly – not only because to do otherwise is inconsiderate of those around them, but also because they can unwittingly reveal personal information that could come back to haunt them.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

To order “How to Write Letters for All Occasions,” send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby — Letter Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447.


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