Every Los Angeles Dodgers player will wear No. 42 on April 15 in honor of Jackie Robinson Day. Don’t be surprised if manager Grady Little mistakes it for No. 45, thinks it’s a Pedro Martinez tribute and celebrates by leaving Derek Lowe in the game until his arm falls off.

SPINNING CLASS

“I certainly wouldn’t call it a gimmick,” Los Angeles Galaxy general manager Alexi Lalas said of his team’s signing David Beckham for the 12th season of Major League Soccer, which begins this weekend. No, and we wouldn’t call it a publicity stunt or cry for help, either.

WISH SANDWICH

The Portland Sea Dogs have “tentatively” rescheduled their season opener for 6 p.m. tonight. Dudes, I hate to spoil the party, but Thursday your employees were busy building snowmen at all nine positions on Hadlock Field.

WHERE DOES IT HURT?

The New Orleans Hornets say starters Tyson Chandler, Desmond Mason and Chris Paul are “day-to-day” after getting hurt in a Wednesday win over Seattle. The Celtics countered their potential draft lottery competition by announcing that M.L. Carr, Jerry Sichting and Greg Kite will start Friday against Miami.

RULES, SCHMOOLS

Actual story lead: “Being forced to use a legal stick in the playoffs may cramp Teemu Selanne’s style. If the Anaheim Ducks plan on winning the Stanley Cup, he’ll have no choice.” Hey man, I know the feeling. Being forced to pay my taxes next week is a real bitch, too.


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