Talk of the Town Ernie Anderson

Important public service note 

So, the day after Halloween, I found myself in desperate need of medication to treat a feline urinary tract infection. A cat had the infection, not me — I know how you weirdos think. So, anyhoos, I went over to Walmart to see if they had anything on the shelves for such a malady and, what do you know? They did. The only problem was that this urinary tract infection medicine — for cats, mind you — was locked up in a glass cabinet. I actually had to flag down a worker in a blue vest to come over with a key to get those meds. The only conclusion I can draw from this is that theft of feline medications is rampant these days because apparently people on the streets are using HomeoPet UTI+ to get high. You parents ought to keep an eye on your kids in case they exhibit symptoms of feline urinary tract medicine abuse. I suppose those symptoms would include lifting one leg in the air or random squatting, depending on the child in question. 

Lock ’em up 

To be fair, I should also point out that Walmart has pretty much their entire camping section locked down these days, too. I went over for an emergency heat blanket and some water purification tabs the other day and pretty much got grilled by some 16-year-old blue vest before they would unlock that cabinet. 

All better 

My cat responded to the meds, by the way. Thank you for asking. I thought it was odd that she chose to cut it up and snort the stuff, but hey. Whatever works. 

While I was away 

Those of you who know me well will recall that every year, I plan my autumn vacation so that I’m out on Election Day. The problem is that this year, I came back to work on the day AFTER the election and that’s where all the moaning and groaning was. I’m still getting back into the swing of things and haven’t got caught up on news yet, so I’m not sure what has occurred. Did we elect a new president or something? 

The early dark 

This time change makes peeing outdoors a lot easier, but I think we’ve all heard enough about outdoor peeing over the past year, so let’s move on. 

The great flag controversy 

So, are we or are we not getting a new state flag? If not, maybe we can scale back on the number of license plate designs that are available, too. Last week I was asked to pick out a plate for a new car registration and the choices were so vast, it stressed me out and I almost went straight back to the UTI+ medication. One day at a time, my friends. One day at a time.