DEAR ABBY: I have been dating a very special man named “Josh” for three years. He has had only one long-term relationship, which produced two children.

My problem is Josh does not believe in marriage. I do not believe in living with someone, and I do believe in marriage.

I have asked Josh for a commitment on several occasions, and I always get a negative response. Am I being strung along, and what should I do? – DOWNHEARTED IN OHIO

DEAR DOWNHEARTED: You’re not being strung along. Josh has been honest with you – he’s not interested in marriage. In order for a marriage to happen, both parties must want to make a commitment. The fact that he has fathered not one, but two children and didn’t marry the mother should be a clue. He’s not the marrying kind.

If marriage is important to you, end this romance and find a partner whose goals are similar to your own. You have devoted more time to this campaign than you should have already.

DEAR ABBY: I have a 2-year-old son who is scared to death of getting his hair cut. In the past, I have done it with electric clippers on the advice of my wife’s hairstylist. Hearing a small child cry and scream is the worst experience in the world. I got so upset the last time that I told my wife I refuse to cut his hair again, because it is so hard on both of us. I suggested we wait until he is older to take him to the barber.

My wife insists that I cut his hair because it is “plucking on her nerves.” I feel it’s too soon and not worth the terror he goes through. Should I stand my ground, or am I too soft-hearted? – WORRIED DAD IN MISSISSIPPI

DEAR DAD: Take your son to a hairdresser who is used to working with children. If necessary, hold the child on your lap while the stylist works his or her “magic.” It may take a little extra time, plus a dose of distraction and child psychology, but the experience needn’t be traumatic for anyone – including you.

DEAR ABBY: A year ago, I left my “day job” to start my own business. Recently two former co-workers referred a couple of clients to me.

I e-mailed and thanked them for the referrals, but what is the correct thing to do if the referrals pan out and I get business from them? Is a thank-you card sufficient? It occurred to me that maybe I should offer to pay a referral fee, but I’m afraid it would be insulting. They are friendly acquaintances, although not close friends, and I know they didn’t refer these people to me in the hope of getting anything out of it for themselves. What do you think? – UNSURE OF WHAT TO DO IN OREGON

DEAR UNSURE: Referral fees are usually agreed upon in advance, and in this case it shouldn’t be necessary. Thanking your former co-workers in writing is the proper thing to do. If the referrals pan out, send them a gift basket with foods and/or beverages they might enjoy.

DEAR ABBY: I was invited to my high school reunion, and I really want to go – but I didn’t graduate with my class. What is the proper thing to do? Should I go or just stay home? – WANTS TO GO IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR WANTS TO GO: The invitation said “reunion.” It’s not a review of who graduated with the class and who didn’t. Since you were invited, and you’d like to see your old classmates, accept the invitation and go. I’m sure they’ll be as glad to see you as you are to see them.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.