Here’s cheerful news from People mag’s Hollywood Daily to make us feel even more wretched about our feeble excuse for a life AND to drive home just how entitled the rich and famous feel: At Sunday night’s Grammys, presenters and performers, including Jennifer Lopez, Alicia Keys and John Mayer, will receive goodie bags worth $34,418.95.

So what do those beauteous celebs get for reading one another’s names off cue cards so bravely? How about an Apple Ipod U2 Special Edition? But we can’t top this one: A $5,600 coupon for Lasik eye surgery.

The goodies also include something from packaged-goods giant Procter & Gamble that celebs can regift to the servants: It’s music to scrub the toilet to! “Take the Bore Out of the Chore, a three-CD compilation, includes tunes by Ben Jelen, Aretha Franklin, Naughty by Nature and Grammy host Queen Latifah.

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