It happens to everyone. It does not care if you are already successful or just on the verge of a break through.
What is it? It is when nothing appears to go right for us. Some call it a downward tailspin. That image of a plane out of control, hurtling itself toward the ground is a frightening and often accurate comparison. Here are several suggestions on how to regain control:
• Decide if you can withdraw yourself from the situation. Or, must you deal with it right now? If you can withdraw without penalty or loss, do so. Then, use some of the following suggestions to get back in control. If you can’t withdraw, notice your breathing pattern. If your breathing is short and erratic, consciously begin to breathe with your diaphragm to calm and center yourself. If the situation depresses you and your body begins to shut down, you might need to speed up your breathing to activate your sympathetic nervous system to help you be alert. Once you have your breathing under control, use the following ideas.
• Assess the situation. Ask yourself, “What has happened? What is the problem? Why am I in this current predicament?” Make sure you consider yourself as one of the sources of the problem. Denial will keep you from finding a viable solution. Make written notes of your ideas about the situation. The accurate assessment of the problem and its causes will allow for finding a solution.
• Now ask yourself, “Can I handle this myself or will I need help?” Do you have the knowledge, energy and resources to resolve the situation effectively? If you need help, identify the people and resources you will need.
• Formulate a plan to regain control or resolve the problem. Put together a systematic approach to deal with it. As Stephen Covey suggests, “begin with the end in mind.” What will the ideal resolution look like? Once that is clear, list the steps between your current situation and the ideal resolution.
• Act, do something positive toward solving the problem. You have “planned your work, now work your plan.”
• Continue until you’ve solved the problem or realize your initial approach won’t work. If your plan doesn’t work, go back through these steps and formulate a new plan. Be certain you understand why your first plan did not work. Very few situations resolve themselves on the first try. By sticking to your resolve to regain control of your life, you increase the odds that you will.
Tim O’Brien writes continuing-education courses and presents seminars on stress management.
Comments are no longer available on this story