JAY – As Herman and Roberta Carlstrom’s three children prepared for today’s joint funeral service for their parents, they talked about the values they inherited from their parents and the love they shared as a family.
The Carlstroms, Herman, 71, and Roberta, 65, died Saturday in a two-car crash on Route 2 in Skowhegan as they were driving to their vacation home in Aroostook County. The family’s cat, Slash, 13, also perished.
The funeral is at 2 p.m. today in Jay High School’s cafeteria.
After their tragic loss, as the couple’s children considered a way to commemorate their parents, Christina, 38, Sonja, 36, and Eric, 28, decided to set up a scholarship and literacy fund.
The Carlstroms had played roles in students’ lives around the state for a total of more than 50 years before retiring from the Jay School Department. Roberta Carlstrom was a second- grade teacher for more than 20 years at the Jay Elementary School before she retired in 1995.
Herman Carlstrom taught history in his early years before becoming a guidance counselor, finishing out his career at Jay Middle School in 1993.
Both continued to be active in the community. She enjoyed reading to children, being a substitute teacher and being involved in literacy programs in Franklin County; he was dedicated to preserving the history of the towns of Jay and Stockholm and sharing his love of photography with the communities.
The younger Carlstroms, Christina of Cape Elizabeth, and Sonja and Eric, both of Boston, spoke about their parents during a telephone conversation Wednesday night from the family home in Jay.
“I think for all of us,” Eric Carlstrom said, “it’s a blessing in disguise. We find a huge consolation that they went together quickly without pain and for them, it was a gift that they did not have to grieve for each other.”
“Right now,” added Christina Carlstrom, “we feel very fortunate to have each other as siblings because we have been able to lean on each other for comfort and support.”
It was obvious listening to the siblings talk that they were close and shared a deep love for their parents and each other.
All three of them attended Jay schools while growing up and, since their parents also were in the Jay school system, they all had summer vacations together.
They shared many traditions, including everyone returning to Jay to celebrate Christmas each year.
“We never missed a single Christmas together,” Eric Carlstrom said.
Sonja Carlstrom described her parents’ relationship as “an inspiration for us; the love between them, the close relationship they had.”
The couple celebrated 40 years of marriage June 12, at the same church they were married at in Bangor.
Eric Carlstrom said his love for learning comes from his parents.
“They were both always going out to improve themselves,” he said. “I feel like I have that within me.”
Christina, who has been writing about her parents’ parenting, called them “an amazing example of devotion and sacrifice as parents.”
“I just remember growing up, and our parents would be at the kitchen table either scoring tests or correcting papers, and they always would find time for us,” Christina said. “We all as kids participated in so many extracurricular activities but they always managed to attend our recitals, our games. … They let us explore anything we had an interest in.”
“They always showed support, and they were proud of our accomplishments no matter how small,” Sonja added.
They have set up The Carlstrom Family Scholarship and Literacy Fund (www.carlstromfund.org) in memory of their parents’ lives and their contributions to education. They haven’t worked out the final details yet, they said. But the funds will be used for various programs and for at least one scholarship in Maine focusing primarily in the Jay area.
“We just wanted to start something that would really honor our parents, the way they wanted to be remembered. Education was such a focus in their lives. This is a great way to have their names live on in a positive way.”
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