When Elizabeth Edwards announced her renewed battle with cancer and her husband, John, announced his intentions to remain in the presidential race, the question came quickly: Why not bow out to spend this crucial time with their two young children?

But those who help parents dealing with their own serious illnesses say the family’s decision to do what was best for them, as well as trying to maintain honesty and some normalcy, can set an example for others in similar situations.

Here are what some experts say on how parents can cope when faced with this kind of difficult moment:

Finding your own right answer

Cancer is an intimate illness that affects each patient differently, so the first rule for parents suffering from the disease is that there is no set rule.

“Every family situation is different, every cancer is different, every child is different,” said Greta Greer, director of survivorship programs for the American Cancer Society.

The severity of the disease, the age of the children and the family dynamic all affect a course of action.

“It’s a personal call,” said cancer survivor Sharon Brunson. “Until someone has dealt with disease, you can’t really understand it.”

Brunson credits the Cancer Survivors Network with helping her sort out emotions that might be too much for her husband and son. The network allows parents to discuss their problems with other survivors.

“For me, it was healthier situation not to overwhelm my little boy with emotions that he wasn’t used to seeing,” Brunson said.

Be honest

While it can be painful and frightening to tell your 8-year-old daughter that you are sick, it’s important to be honest and tell them yourself, experts say. Don’t skirt the issue, because kids have a way of finding out the truth.

“Don’t be afraid of the word cancer,” said Diane Blum, executive director of CancerCare. “I grew up when people used to whisper the word cancer, and we’ve come a long way from that. It’s much better to tell your children what you have. Imagination is often worse than reality. Give them the facts.”

Age-appropriate information

In the Edwards’ case, their children are 6 and 8 years old — cognizant enough to know what cancer is, but probably not prepared to realize the extent of it. Blum stresses what she calls “age-appropriate information.”

“You want to gear toward your children’s intellectual capacity,” she said. “Six- and 8-year-olds do understand the concept of people being sick, while a 3-year-old probably does not. Ask yourself what their learning abilities are, what their emotional abilities are.”

Promote normalcy

Merely learning that your mother or father has a potentially fatal illness is devastating news for any child, so it’s important to buffer those feelings with as much normalcy as possible, Greer said. Stick to the routines you developed before cancer, as much as you can. Don’t let your children see the disease taking over your life, counselors advise.