NOT HIS LAST CHANCE

LeBron James took some heat for passing up a potential game-tying shot Monday night against the Pistons. Y’all, Donyell Marshall was buck-naked open. And last time I checked, James just now should be entering the draft with Greg Oden after leading Ohio State to a national title his senior year. Cut him a little slack.

L-S-YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals have asked Louisiana State University not to replace its deceased Bayou Bengal with a new, live tiger. Yet another stop on the road to a world in which the only acceptable mascots and nicknames are the nouns a 5-year-old supplies to a game of Mad Libs.

FAR OUT, MAN

In his new biography, George Foreman suggests he was drugged by a trainer prior to the “Rumble in the Jungle” against Muhammad Ali. And to think, that wasn’t even the fight at which God spoke to him.

BARKING UP THE WRONG TREE

Clinton Portis doesn’t think dog fighting allegations against Michael Vick are scandalous. “It’s his property. It’s his dog. If that’s what he wants to do, do it,” the Redskins’ running back told a Virginia TV station. “I think people should mind their business It can’t be too bad of a crime.” Hey, I’m only the messenger.

IF YOU CAN’T BEAT ‘EM, AVOID ‘EM

Michelle Wie will try to make the cut at the PGA John Deere Classic for the third straight year. It’s scheduled the week before the British Open, which means Wie will courageously battle Briny Baird, Robert Gamez and Jason Gore for the privilege of finishing in a tie for 63rd.

SPINNIN’ THEIR WHEELS

The Floyd Landis arbitration hearing is on pace to cost over $1 million. Never again shall the cycling cult be able to ridicule the pampered excess of stick-and-ball athletes with any credibility.

CATCH A FALLING RECEIVER

Denver Broncos WR David Kircus was slapped with a restraining order after his weekend arrest on assault charges. Coach Mike Shanahan hinted that Kircus could be cut after he gathers more facts about the case. The Bengals are thrilled. They need someone to fill in during Chris Henry’s suspension.


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