Noon, ESPN2

Six-foot-three Akgul Amanmuradova of Uzbekistan is the tallest woman in the French Open. I’d be more impressed if they used her name in tonight’s National Spelling Bee.

Softball: College World Series, Game 1

1 p.m., ESPN

ESPN has a triple-header of softball action scheduled for today. And the total combined time of all three won’t add up to one Yanks/Sox game.

Baseball: Columbus at Pawtucket

7 p.m., NESN

The Yankees don’t want Clemens facing the PawSox, either.

NBA: Cavaliers at Pistons, Game 5

8 p.m., TNT

Cavs guard Larry Hughes started Game 4 despite suffering from a partial tear of the plantar fascia. This confuses me, because whenever I hear “plantar fascia,” I think “Nazi peanut baron.” Wearing a monocle, of course.

Best Damn Top 50 Moments of the 80s

9 p.m., FSNE

Just show Larry Bird’s mullet, the Houston Astros’ ugly uniforms, Katarina Witt, the last 10 seconds of the Miracle on Ice, and the ball going through Buckner’s legs and you’ll have the decade covered in four minutes.

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