NBA Access with Ahmad Rashad

2 p.m., ESPN

It’s afternoon programming like this that allows Jerry Springer’s bodyguard to have his own talk show.

Classic College Football: Colorado at Missouri, 1990

2 p.m., ESPN Classic

The infamous “Five-Down Game.” On a related note, five downs is about the only thing the Patriots haven’t been accused of doing yet.

Natalie Gulbis Show

3:30 p.m., The Golf Channel

Natalie Gulbis has her own show? Why was I not informed? How can I keep my wife from finding out?

NHL: Penguins at Wild (taped)

5 p.m., Versus

Some had this as a potential Stanley Cup preview. I can wait until the Stanley Cup Finals to find out.

NBA: Mavericks at Cavaliers

8 p.m., ESPN

Want to really scare some trick-or-treaters? Invite them into the living room when Hubie Brown is on camera.

NBA: Sonics at Nuggets

10:30 p.m., ESPN

It’s not good news for Seattle fans, or Oklahoma City fans for that matter, when the season hasn’t even started and Kevin Durant is already banged-up.