Defining fatherhood? Robert Roy’s Nov. 20 letter sounded domineering, self-aggrandizing and narcissistic.

I agree many men undervalue the importance of fathers, but how fathers view and carry out their roles is my issue here. Fathers who value respect will seldom have to demand it. Reverence is not a goal, but a result.

Fathers who are rigid, domineering figures bent on subservience and demanding reverence, will make all others around him play submissive roles. Our daughters learn submissive behaviors, which promote a victim mentality, by seeing mom bow to all the demands of the father. Our sons learn power and control as being what a man is really all about. Child molestation, rape and domestic violence all have roots in this type of thinking and behavior.

“Old school” is not always “good school.”

I believe the most important lessons a boy can learn come from a healthy nurturing mother. Patience, tenderness and empathy are important traits to pass onto children – embracing his “X” chromosome.”

Most men do play a dominant role within the family. However, our sons and daughters benefit greatly from the example of a strong father in a “give and take” partnership between parents. Sacrifices, always made by both parents, somehow don’t matter. It’s called “parenting.”

Roy was not defining fatherhood, rather omnipotence. Omnipotence is selfishness. While I strive to be loved, respected and revered by my family, I hope to earn these things on my own merits.

Defining fatherhood? Please.

David D. T. Marquis, Lewiston