DEAR ABBY: My wife, “Jana,” and I have been married 15 years. She’s the love of my life. I can’t imagine living without her. We have three beautiful children, successful careers and a nice home. We have a great relationship, and I trust her completely.

Before we dated, Jana ran with a fast crowd. She was also somewhat promiscuous back then. Don’t get me wrong, there are things from my past that I’m not proud of, either. But it bothers me that her “adventures” exceeded mine.

We went to Jana’s class reunion last fall, and I met several friends from her past. Each guy I met, I couldn’t help but wonder if he had slept with my wife. I know about some of her old boyfriends, but not all.

I think Jana knows this bothered me, but she doesn’t know how much. I literally became nauseated thinking about her past. After almost 20 years of dating and marriage, I thought I’d be over it. Should I press her for more details or just live with the knots in my stomach? — CURIOUS GEORGE IN LOUISVILLE

DEAR GEORGE: Neither. After 20 years of dating and marriage, it’s time to grow up. You have a happy, successful marriage — so why are you wasting time obsessing about the distant past? If you have digestive problems, discuss them with your doctor or a therapist. But to ask your wife for a scorecard at this late date will be counterproductive, and I doubt that it will fix what ails you. And in the future — skip the reunions.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 12-year-old girl who attends a private middle school. When I go to school, I see girls my age wearing a little bit of makeup. When I try to sneak off to school with a little bit on my face, my parents wipe it off and say I’m beautiful just the way I am, although I disagree.

Abby, I will be 13 next month! I’m absolutely positive that I can handle makeup without going overboard. But when I say it to my parents, they still forbid me to wear or buy any. How do I convince them that I’m mature enough to handle this? — NOT IMMATURE IN NYC

DEAR NOT IMMATURE: Your parents regard you as their little girl and may be hoping to keep you that way for another year. One of the hallmarks of maturity is being honest with your parents. If you want to convince them that you’re mature enough to handle makeup, perhaps you should consider not sneaking out of the house wearing any. Prove to them that you can be trusted, and they’ll have faith in your judgment — and I’m not just talking about makeup.

DEAR ABBY: I have been arguing with my husband over something, and I hope you can settle it once and for all. When he gets out of the shower, he leaves the curtain open. I prefer to keep it closed because I think it looks nicer to see a closed shower curtain in the bathroom.

My husband insists it should stay open to make sure the tub dries. I think the tub will dry regardless, since the air can flow over the curtain rod, and the curtain will become moldy if it’s all scrunched up. Who is right? — STEAMY IN TEXAS

DEAR STEAMY: I did some checking, and was told by a major hotel chain that its housekeeping staff leaves the shower curtains pushed to the side (open) so air can flow through. However, those curtains are laundered frequently.

I also contacted the bed and bath department of a national department store chain, and the manager suggested leaving the curtain halfway open in the middle of the shower — open at both ends — to allow the air to circulate.

That may be a satisfying compromise to both of you.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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