The method may vary from bride to bride, but the bottom line remains the same – weddings planned with a budget in mind can be every bit as meaningful and special as their lavish counterparts.

Jill Neustadt Hyland, Amanda Baillargeon DeFlumere and Pattie Barry Reaves all kept wedding expenses down in different ways.

Southern Style

Hyland, an energetic ELL teacher at Edward Little High School in Auburn, married husband Doug five years ago in Boone, North Carolina. They decided to spend more money on what they believe was most important while finding inexpensive alternatives for other aspects of the wedding.

“We did try to keep expenses down,” she said. “We were married in the middle of a valley in the Appalachian Mountains. The ceremony was in an old church with no power; the reception was outside under a tent. In total, we spent maybe $15,000 or so with the tent rental, tables, linens and such being the bulk of it.”

Hyland said the one aspect of the wedding they didn’t compromise on was their photographer “knowing that was all we would have when the day was over besides memories,” she explained.

In other areas, Hyland made use of her imagination. “I made the decorations for the tent, used Mason jars and such for the vases. Hung paper flowers from the ceiling of the tent. All flowers were from a local grower down the road – wicked cheap – planted dahlias in advance.”

She said they used the same flowers in different ways for each event surrounding the wedding itself. “Food was from a local caterer and, again, a great deal – bluegrass and BBQ, I mean it was in the south.”

The band they hired included a friend from high school. “Not cheap, but well worth it.” Hyland continued, “I got a gown from David’s Bridal – maybe $300 – and I loved it. Shoes… oh wait! I didn’t wear any!”

Hyland ordered invitations on-line and a local business printed them and the thank-you notes. “It turned out to be more expensive than I would have liked, but, oh well!” she conceded.

Hyland’s favorite part of the wedding was “having friends and family from 17 different states all come to my stomping ground and celebrate for three days – the rehearsal dinner, a cocktail party and a Sunday wedding and reception. It was amazing.” Although she loved her wedding, five years can make a difference in perspective. “If I had to do it again, I would elope and head somewhere tropical, with a handful of people, and be in surf trunks and flip flops!”

Traditional yet affordable

When Amanda and Bob Deflumere were planning their Nov. 14 wedding at the Basilica of Saints Peter and Paul in Lewiston, they kept a definite dollar figure in mind.

“I set a $10,000 budget and worked hard to stick to it,” she said. “Because the average American wedding is around $20,000 to $30,000 dollars, I first tried to estimate the costs of all the aspects of my wedding in order to decide how much money I needed. For me, it was about low budget, but still keeping my wedding elegant, simple and fun. I also had a plan in mind for what I wanted in all aspects of my wedding. That helped when I went shopping for deals. All my flowers were purchased at Walmart, and all my centerpieces at the reception came from the Christmas Tree Shop. Having a plan is what helps you save money.”

DeFlumere, an elementary teacher at Trinity School in Lewiston, looked first at what resources were available to her and what connections she could utilize. “I’m lucky enough to have a talented father, who saved me a lot of money!” she admitted. “If you are crafty and like to do a lot of things yourself, then I recommend you do that and get friends and family to help. My father designed my invitations, and we crafted them at home. The only costs to us were for the stamps and paper, almost half the cost if not more” than specialty invitations. Other ideas to save money also involved her father, Leo Baillargeon, who happens to be creative in a number of areas.

“I had my father make my cake, and I went with a small cake. Sheet cakes can be made to ensure all guests get a piece. Cakes can be very expensive, so I decided to make it simple and use my money on other things I really wanted,” she said. ” I chose artificial flowers for keepsake reasons and the cost. Real flowers are very pricey, and then you have to add labor. Simple, hand-held bouquets are also a way to save pennies; choose one of your favorite flowers and work around that. Again, my father created the floral arrangements for the bridal party, ushers and the church.”

The reception took place at the Ramada Inn in Lewiston, and “instead of purchasing individual keepsakes for all our guests, we decided to be kids at heart and offer a candy buffet. I saved about five dollars a person by having the buffet, and it turned out to be a huge hit!” she said. “I had many of our favorite candies and a rock-candy bouquet in the center. The bags to put the candy in were purchased at the dollar store.”

DeFlumere said they chose a simple, not extravagant, honeymoon destination – North Conway, New Hampshire. “Our honeymoon was a time for us to get away and truly spend time with one another without breaking our bank,” she explained.

She estimated spending at least $2,000 less than the original budget. “It was all about getting the bargains when I saw them and sticking to my plan of action and my budget. Once you cheat, it’s all over. I kept all my receipts and documented all the money I spent and what it was for. That helped to keep me on track to know what I was spending, how close I was to my budget, and the breakdown of what would cost the most.”

DeFlumere suggested finding out first the expenses associated with the major parts of the wedding, such as the church or location, reception hall, food and beverages. “Then your budget can be worked around that. For example, I spent a little more for the limo, but saved in the long run because instead of getting two limos to accommodate our large wedding party, we chose a Hummer, and we all fit into it!”

Elegant and memorable

Sun Journal employees Pattie and Tony Reaves of Lewiston had about seven months to pull together their budget-conscious wedding.
“He proposed in February on my 24th birthday, and we were married (last) September 26 in Bangor,” she related. “We had been dating for a couple of years, so it wasn’t a huge surprise.”

Although they both felt a big wedding would be nice, “it was just a stepping stone to the marriage,” she explained. “Time was important to me; I wanted it to happen quickly, but I also wanted friends and family there, not just a ceremony at City Hall.”

Reaves said they selected their date first. “Then I looked at money and decided what we could put away toward the wedding,” she said. “We paid for all of it ourselves, and that was a matter of pride for me, as I’m the oldest of five.”

By adding up the monthly savings and including a tax return, Reaves said their budget turned out to be $4,600, about $1,000 more than they estimated originally because they were able to save more aggressively than expected.

“It’s a real temptation when you see beautiful flowers and the gorgeous cakes,” she acknowledged. “We didn’t spend much on the clothing. I shopped at a thrift store in Bangor and found my dress there. Many of them had not even been worn. I spent $300, and that was a splurge for me. We rented inexpensive suits for the groom; it’s less expensive to rent than buy.”

One of the greatest ways they saved was to select a location where they could serve their own food and alcohol. “The Isaac Farrar Mansion (featuring deep mahogany woodwork, marble fireplaces, oriental rugs and beautiful stained glass windows) is run by the Bangor Y, and the deal is you rent the mansion and the rooms and you cater the entire event. A lot of places insist on an open bar, and that will kill any budget.”

In addition, Reaves noted her husband brews his own beer, and they wanted to serve that. Another option they considered would be a state park, renting a picnic area for about $30 a day, but opted for the mansion. “We paid $600 for the (facility), but it included everything, such as tables, chairs, chafing dishes for the buffet,” she said. “We did have to pay extra for tablecloths, but that was it.”

Reaves said there were about 80 people at the reception. “When we originally sat down and did the budget, we thought we could afford 60 people, but the cost of the food was not as much as we expected, and because we spent less, we could invite more guests.”

Reaves, like DeFlumere, tapped into personal resources. “My family catered the reception,” she said, noting her brother, a professional chef, assisted by her brother-in-law, coordinated the meal. “If you get everyone to pitch in, you can save a lot of money,” she stressed.
Were she to plan it again, she might have given them a little more time between engagement and wedding. “I was in a hurry, and after I got married, I still had 6 months left on my bridal magazine subscription!” Also, she realized too late that keeping the bridal party small didn’t save as much money as she expected. “They filled in a lot of the costs themselves, and I might have slighted some really good friends in the process,” she conceded.

Her advice is to “make a budget, make a budget, make a budget” and stick to it. “It’s not that hard to figure out your income,” she quipped. “You have a general idea of what extra money there is. It’s as simple as that. We didn’t want to start our marriage with debt (carried over from the wedding), but we also didn’t save much money for the honeymoon, so we went to Montreal – a place we had visited before. It was sentimental and affordable.”