LEWISTON — Looking at his audience at the Lewiston Middle School on Wednesday night, bullying-prevention expert Michael Dorn said each person has power to change lives, to prevent bullying, if they’re connected to others.

Bullies find reasons to pick on someone. “The question is, what will we allow? What will we tolerate in our schools?” he asked.

The United States is a great country, but until every child who is different can walk the halls of school, left alone and given the school’s best, “we tarnish the very sacrifice our country is founded upon,” he said. “Schools should be there for all, with dignity and honor and respect for all.”

Dorn, who lives in Georgia, is a graduate of the FBI National Academy and the executive director of Safe Havens International, a global, nonprofit school safety center. He has written 25 books on school safety, and has spent time in Lewiston-Auburn this week helping schools improve safety.

Dorn said the dynamics of bullying in schools can change in a hurry depending on how adults and students interact.

He illustrated by telling the true story of Stephen, “a fun-loving child growing up in New York.”

Stephen loved to play in the woods pretending he was a pioneer or an explorer. One day he was molested by two teenage boys. He told no one. “Stephen changed that day.”

He became nervous, afraid of people. “School became a fearful place.”

Soon his life changed further. His father found a better job and moved the family to Alabama. In a new school Stephen was now not only nervous, but different.

“He was teased and picked on.”

Stephen was diagnosed with dyslexia. He was moved to different schools. His disability became worse when he was frightened. In one school, he was beaten up his first day, chased home to his doorstep.

“Then, in the sixth grade, Stephen encountered a barracuda.” Barracudas prey on what Dorn called “weakfish,” those who are smaller, slower, weaker.

The barracuda stood a foot taller than other students. “He would beat Stephen savagely in the school bathroom.” Stephen tried hard not to go to the bathroom.

One day Stephen found himself trapped in the bathroom with the bully. “The barracuda did something different. Stephen was degraded.” Another day the teacher left the classroom for a few minutes and appointed who she thought was a trustworthy person. “She appointed the most dangerous student in the building, the barracuda,” Dorn said.

The bully approached Stephen’s desk, ordered him to stand. Stephen resisted, and found his head slammed to the floor. The teacher returned, saw Stephen’s hair matted with blood. She asked what happened. No one spoke up because they were afraid. “Stephen said he fell,” which was believed by the teacher, the principal, his parents and doctors at the hospital.

No one saw what was happening because they weren’t looking for it,” Dorn said. To help others “we have to be closely connected to the people around us.”

Stephen lost desire to go to school and started thinking about death.

But there were many who helped. Friends, teachers, volunteers, the bus driver, a Boy Scout leader, police officers. There was no one turning point for Stephen, but many people in the right place and the right time who reached out and stood up for Stephen, even when it wasn’t popular. “Those are people who really shape our lives.”

Dorn told the audience he’s the boy in his story. “I’m Michael Stephen Dorn,” he said. “They said I’d never read a book, I’d never finish high school. I finished college. I write books.” He credited the dozens who helped him, saying they were connected.

He praised Lewiston-Auburn for its Safe Schools/Healthy Students work to build safer schools. “They’re not waiting for a tragedy to force them to act. They’re doing a very thoughtful process of evaluation.”

In answering one parent’s question, Dorn said bullies bully because they lack empathy, and because they can get away with it. Places that do nothing when inappropriate behavior happens get more bad behavior, he said.

In addition to educating students, schools can make changes that take away bullying opportunities, like how students are supervised.

When a teacher walks a class down a hall, “where is the teacher?” Dorn asked. In the front, the audience answered.

“What if we put kids in rows of two, have the teacher position herself behind, or in the middle.” The teacher could see all the students, “and make it hard for me to bully.”

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