Things to consider while contemplating whether the release of our strategic oil reserve is a harbinger of a Pat Riley coaching comeback:

• Everyone seems to be living vicariously through Andrew Marchand’s debaucherous Stanley Cup Celebration Tour. But I wonder what the reaction would be if Glen Davis or Rajon Rondo painted the town the same way after winning the Larry O’Brien Trophy.

• Putting Adrian Gonzalez in the outfield hasn’t been the dumbest idea I’ve heard this week, but that’s only because some idiot decided to leave a bar and get into a car with one of the stars of “Jackass.”

It isn’t just the threat of injury to the best hitter in baseball that makes it an illogical move. Gonzalez is on an absolute tear, especially against the National League. Why would you do anything to mess with that? I understand Terry Francona has to find a way to get his third best hitter (Jacoby Ellsbury has been better than David Ortiz) some at-bats during the long road trip, but disrupting your best player to do it is just plain nutty.

Give Gonzalez a day or two off during the road trip. Have Ortiz replace him in blowouts to get an at-bat or two. But don’t put Gonzalez in right field where, incidentally, you also put Ellsbury, who has been known to have a collision or two in the outfield, at greater risk of getting hurt, too.

• Speaking of stupid ideas — baseball’s realignment proposal (15 teams in each league, no divisions) is preposterous as long as the American and National leagues play by different rules. The players will never agree to dropping the DH and the NL teams will never agree to adding the DH. If Bud Selig truly wants realignment, he’ll need to really shake things up, either completely reconstructing the two leagues or eliminating them altogether to form a monolithic league.

• If I were St. Dom’s, the first thing I’d do is lobby the Maine Principals’ Association to permanently move the Class C baseball state championship game to Mansfield Stadium in Bangor.

The Saints have won the last four title games held there, and every state baseball trophy in their trophy case has made the trip from Bangor to the Twin Cities (they’re 0-2 when the game is played in Western Maine, incidentally). The second thing I would do is try to interest coach Bob Blackman in a lifetime contract.

• Lewiston would do well to try to get Todd Cifelli to sign on the dotted line, too. What Cifelli has done to turn around the baseball program at LHS can’t be overstated. It goes beyond his ability recognize talent (he’s an associate scout for the Cincinnati Reds) and develop it. He completely changed the culture of the program after taking over in 2006.

One thing you could count on with a Lewiston team before he arrived, if the opposition couldn’t beat the Blue Devils, the Blue Devils would take matters into their own hands and beat themselves, like they knew that was what was expected of them. By instilling his players with confidence, a strong work ethic, respect for the game and the preparation it takes to play it right, Cifelli has made Lewiston a perennial factor in the KVAC. And it should continue, even with the graduation of six talented starters.

• Why are the same people who crowned Tiger Woods the greatest who ever lived after he won a couple of majors now begging everyone to stop comparing Rory McIlroy to him?

• It seemed odd reading a story about a Maine high school coach stepping down after compiling a record of 137-2, which is what Lewiston boys’ tennis coach Ron Chicoine did this week. Usually when you read about those kind of numbers, they have been accrued by a football coach in Texas or a wrestling coach in Iowa.

Chicoine resigned after winning his eighth state title in nine seasons. Such dynasties are rare anywhere, but particularly rare in Maine. What makes it all the more remarkable that Chicoine’s mother, Anita Murphy, has coached the Lewiston girls to 12 state titles, including the last six in a row.

• In 1975, the Boston Red Sox outfield featured a pair of rookies, Fred Lynn and Jim Rice, collectively dubbed the “Gold Dust Twins.” In 2011, they have a rightfield platoon of Mike Cameron and J.D. Drew that should be referred to henceforth as the “Old Rust Twins.”

The 38-year-old Cameron should be playing in park league somewhere, and he would be if he weren’t one of Francona’s favorite human beings. Drew looks ready to join him, but I’ve vowed to give him a 30-day grace period because he’s one of the few players who insists on not having walk-up music played when he steps up to the plate. If he isn’t hovering around .250 by July 24, Theo Epstein needs to find a new rightfielder.

• While he’s misguided in matters concerning Gonzalez, Ortiz, Cameron and Drew, I do give Francona a lot of credit for how he’s handled the starting rotation, given that four of the five starters he left Fort Myers with have missed starts. It helps to have the depth he’s had to work with, but Francona has handled the likes of Tim Wakefield and Alfredo Aceves masterfully, and I’m sure he’ll be just as adept with Andrew Miller.

• Why do general managers always say they were surprised or excited to see the player they drafted drop down to them? Just once, I’d like to see a GM interviewed after a draft who says “Yeah, a lot of teams passed on him. But who did you want us to pick? The guy with the glass eye? The pickings were kind of slim where we were drafting, you know?”

• Any slack Bruins fans were finally willing to cut B’s owner Jeremy Jacobs for their first Stanley Cup in 39 years should have been immediately rescinded when Jacobs made the following remark about Cam Neely at the parade: “(Neely) brought us a Stanley Cup (as team president), something he couldn’t do while he was skating.”

Yeah, Jeremy, you’re right. He never gave you a Cup while he was playing. All he did was give you his right leg (thanks, Ulf) to try to win you a Cup in the early/mid-1990s. Here’s hoping somewhere in the course of its travels over the next few months, Lord Stanley’s chalice briefly finds a home on a flimsy shelf above J.J.’s headboard.

• If you’re jonesing for off-season football as much as ESPN and the rest of the NFL’s lapdog media seems to think you are, the CFL starts up next weekend. Sure, it’s minor league football, but at least the Canadian owners are honest about their greed. Plus their kickers are tougher than either Sedin.

Randy Whitehouse is a staff writer. His email is rwhitehouse@sunjournal.com.

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