A bride should have only two responsibilities on her wedding day and those are to be happy and pretty. And that, along with the mountain of details associated with getting a bride and groom successfully to the altar and through to the end of the reception, said Sallie Tyler, of The Paper White Room, doesn’t happen by accident.

Tyler is a wedding planner, a profession that she says is not always glamorous. “Although magazines never really talk about the nuts and bolts of the day, there are also websites, books and other places, including hiring a wedding planner, that a bride can use to obtain information to keep on track with respect to the nuts and bolts.”

Wedding websites, such as www.projectwedding.com and www.weddingwire.com, have information on everything from cakes and wedding dresses, to bridesmaid dresses, centerpieces, cake tops and destination weddings. It’s a more do-it-yourself approach to wedding planning. A wedding planner will help you take care of all of these details — and more — and can provide a physical presence both before and during the wedding.

Weddings are not inexpensive events and to determine the ultimate cost, Tyler suggested that a couple take the number of guests they plan to invite and add two zeros to that number. This is where they will need to start when determining their budget.

Tyler tells her brides that the most important things are the food, venue and music and that “everything else is just fluff.” Doing these three things right will make a wedding enjoyable and memorable for the couple and will send their guests home dancing with warm memories of their own.

In many cases, the parents of the bride are the ones paying the bill and a wedding planner is always the bride’s advocate. “I make sure that the bride gets what she wants.” Tyler also noted that the mother of the bride can often become stressed, emotional and overwhelmed. A wedding planner will help to make her day more enjoyable as well. Generally, a wedding planner is “a cool head” when things go wrong, and objective where brides and their mothers can be emotional.

Websites like “weddingwire” and www.theknot.com offer useful checklists, advice and information on everything from planning basics such as creating a checklist and getting organized to sticky subjects. According to “The Knot,” whether you’re dealing with “tricky family issues, spats with your bridesmaids, cold feet, or other relationship issues, sometimes weddings bring out rude behavior even in the most courteous friend or family member.” In the 10 years that she has been planning weddings, Tyler admitted that she has seen it all.

Although most families do recognize that this day belongs to the wedding couple, sometimes a bride or couple experience problems relating to the expectations and wishes of parents and other family members. A professional wedding planner should be able to mediate between the brides and grooms and their families. Tyler said, “Family can drive the bride and groom nuts. I can give a bride the perfect line to use for every situation when it comes to matters involving family.”

Focusing on the nuts and bolts, a wedding planner also knows the best vendors to work with, and is able to recommend a vendor that can perform the task at hand within the couple’s budget. A website can only list what is available in your area. After the vendor is retained, the wedding planner stays in touch with each vendor up to, during and even after the wedding day to make sure that everything happens in accordance with the couple’s vision and budget.

“The most important reason to hire a wedding planner is to get you down the aisle.” More specifically, said Tyler, on the day of the wedding, the wedding planner is there to:

Get the bride to the door

Cue the music

Remind the ushers where to stand and to stop talking

Hand out bride and bridesmaid bouquets

Pin corsages

Calm nerves

Handle crises

Check on all the vendors to make sure they are set up and ready

Show the caterers where the cake needs to go

At the reception, the wedding planner will take care of details such as making sure the bride eats and handing the wedding couple their champagne at the right moment. She will make sure the parents are there when it’s time to cut the cake and speak with the father of the bride and groomsmen about their toasts to avoid embarrassing moments for the bride and groom.

Although the bulk of her business is small gatherings, showers and parties, Tyler has planned over 100 events. She recently opened “The Paper White Room,” a space in downtown Farmington that is available for events and soirees, according to her brochure.

“As the wedding planner, I make sure that there is a clear and concise plan of action,” said Tyler, who is the first to arrive and the last to leave any event that she plans. “I count the linens in and count the linens out,” she said, making sure that nothing goes amiss and the couple’s day goes off with only one “hitch.”