Skeet shooting: Did it, loved it, would do it again. The Outdoor Discovery Program has a variety of shooting sports to pick from and most of them involve a shotgun, which is just plain fun.
Stand-up paddle boarding: All your life, your elders have been telling you to not stand up in the boat. Stand up the boat, they’ve warned you a zillion times, and you’ll fall out and die in the lake and nobody will ever find your bones. Now there’s a watercraft specifically designed for standing up. Go figure. Take this course and your dear old pepere will weep for your soul. I don’t have a pepere, myself, so I’d be happy to try it out.
Fly-fishing: I’ve never fly fished. (Flew fished?) I have a feeling I’d either be a natural at it or I’d be so terrible that everyone within a mile radius would spend the rest of their lives wearing eye patches. I’ve maimed people just casting a regular old fishing line, let alone this fancy fly-fishing stuff. I’d be willing to give it a go, though. Come watch me! You’d look great in an eye patch.
Kayaking: Are you kidding me, bro? I kayak. I kayak plenty. Before I went out and got a dual sport motorcycle, kayaking was pretty much all I wanted to do. I haven’t picked up that weird two-sided paddle since I got on two wheels, so I’m sure any skills I might have had once have vanished.
Compass skills: Sure, I’d give that a go. How much do you want to bet, though, that I’d get lost on my way to the training site? Heck, I’d get lost intentionally just for the irony.
Geocaching adventures: Thank you, no. My wife used to make me go letter boxing all over creation. I didn’t care for it, sir, and this sounds a lot like letter boxing. Pass.
Wilderness fire skills: I’d take this class, though I don’t really need it. Have you seen my handmade rocket stove? Ever beheld the glory of one of my Dakota holes? I’ve got mad skills, yo. I also have a Bic.
Cross-country skiing: I’d do this, but only if we can do it in summertime. The thing I don’t like about skiing, you have to understand, is the snow. And the cold. And the skiing. So, nope.
Women-only adventures: I’d go along for this for sure, but I have a feeling I would soon wish I hadn’t. But isn’t that how all great adventures go? Sign me up.
Canoeing: Can I stand up in the canoe? Because in that paddle board class they let us stand up.
Bird watching: Been there, done that. The Outdoor Discovery Program offers a variety of guided bird excursions and nature walks, including a bird-watching hike on Monhegan Island for $159.
Biking: Only if I can bring my Suzuki DR650. Pedaling is too hard.
Outdoor yoga: Already did that. We were inside, but there was a window open, so I’m counting it.
Competitive Slip-n-Slide: No, they don’t really offer this class. Wouldn’t it be awesome if they did, though?
For a complete list of available activities and a calendar of events, visit llbean.com
— Mark LaFlamme, Sun Journal
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