RUMFORD — As a girl, Mary Theriault was very shy. One of eight children, she grew up “way out in the woods” where she spent a lot of time caring for her pets, enjoying fishing and connecting with nature.

Overcoming that shyness is one example of how she and her husband, Jim, grew together and helped each other through their 54 years of marriage, she said.

“I was so afraid to speak up,” Mary said. “When we started our family, I had not had my license for very long. I was fine driving around town, but taking the children to the dentist in Lewiston or to a doctor’s appointment if they were sick was difficult for me. I would depend on Jim to call and set things up and always expected him to go with me.”

However, with Jim’s career as a Rumford police officer beginning in 1972, he encouraged her to get past her fears and drive to the out-of-town appointments for their family’s sake.

He said he told her, “It can’t go on like this; I may go to work in the morning and not come home at night. With this job, you don’t know (what might happen). I need to know that you can take care of our kids and you can speak up for yourself.”

“I came home with a horrible migraine,” she said, “but I did it. And that was it, I knew I could do it after that one time. So, he was good for me in that way, and I think I was good for him to calm him down.”

In their years of marriage Jim said he “could count on both hands the disagreements we’ve had.”

Even so, they “had some growing to do,” Mary said.

For instance, when Jim had worked his first few years as a Rumford police officer, he decided he would go to the bank for a loan to buy a motorcycle.

“I never mentioned it to Mary,” he said. “So, I go riding home on the motorcycle and I pull up in the driveway, go in the house and she looks at me, and her jaw drops to the floor. She didn’t talk to me for three days.”

They decided no purchases or big decisions were made without talking it over together from then on.

Jim credits their happy and long-lasting relationship to both of them. “It’s been a two-way thing,” he said. “We couldn’t have lasted if it was just me or if it was just her (working on their relationship.) I think we work really well together.”

When Mary was upset about issues that cropped up between them, she would write him a letter and leave it on his pillow.

“I’m a crier,” she said, “so I couldn’t tell him how I felt about some things that we might not agree about. A note or letter was easier for me. After he read it, we could sit down and have a good talk. It worked great. It was really a wonderful way for us to learn how to communicate and grow together in a positive way.”

Having an adventure together after their children became adults was another positive part of their relationship. They decided to buy a run-down campground on Roxbury Pond, now Silver Lake Campground, where their families had spent summers when they were young.

They ran the campground for nearly 20 years and now their daughter, Jami Holmes, and her husband, Bob Holmes, own it.

Two of Mary and Jim’s daughters shared their written thoughts on what makes their parents’ love story so special.

“What makes my parents’ love story so special?” Jami wrote. “Their laughter. They are laughing together at life and laughing with each other. They find humor in their life together every day and it’s so endearing.”

Her sister, Terri Demmons wrote, “…The way they are a team. Life could be hard. Things could be stressful. Mom and Dad’s love was a given — something that I could depend on when other things got stressful in my life. I watched them weather every storm with their love as a solid foundation to stand on.”

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