I have good news and I have bad news. The good news is that Tom Lehrer has placed all of his songs in the public domain, and you can listen to them, sing them, and even record them for free.
The bad news is that Tom Lehrer has placed all of his songs in the public domain, and you can listen to them, sing them, and even record them for free.
If you are familiar with Lehrer’s work, you’ll understand why what I just wrote is funny. He has written some of the wittiest socially/politically incorrect songs imaginable. Though most of his songs are from the 1960s and ’70s, they are just as cringe-worthy today. Maybe even more so.
If you don’t know Lehrer’s work, let me save you some pain (and laughter) by describing a few of his songs.
He celebrates springtime and the joys thereof in his song, Poisoning the Pigeons in the Park.
“All the world seems in tune On a spring afternoon When we’re poisoning pigeons in the park. Every Sunday you’ll see My sweetheart and me As we poison the pigeons in the park. When they see us coming The birdies all try an’ hide, But they still go for peanuts When coated with cyanide . . .”
Has this driven you away from his melodic doorstep? If not, how about his love songs, such as She’s My Girl, which includes this heart-melting sentiment:
“In winter the bedroom is one large ice cube, And she squeezes the toothpaste from the middle of the tube. Her hairs in the sink Have driven me to drink, But she’s my girl, she’s my girl, she’s my girl, And I love her.”
When You are Old and Gray starts out:
“Since I still appreciate you, Let’s find love while we may, Because I know I’ll hate you When you are old and gray.”
And the lovely I Hold Your Hand in Mine, which I dare you to listen to, but only if your stomach is strong and your sense of humor bizarre.
Where Lehrer really shines is in the area of social and political commentary.
His song, Pollution, recorded in 1965, starts out:
“If you visit American city, You will find it very pretty. Just two things of which you must beware: Don’t drink the water and don’t breathe the air! Pollution, pollution! They got smog and sewage and mud. Turn on your tap and get hot and cold running crud!”
Just a few of the topics Lehrer musically skewers are the Boy Scouts (Be Prepared), mathematics (New Math), religion (Vatican Rag and A Christmas Carol), rural America (The Wild West Is Where I Want to Be and I Wanna Go Back to Dixie), World War III (We Will All Go Together When We Go and So Long, Mom), and race relations (National Brotherhood Week).
His website, tomlehrersongs.com, contains all of his songs. Listen or download to your soul’s content. Should the site disappear (which he warns it might), search for Tom Lehrer on YouTube.
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