On May 16, NJ Assemblyman Declan O’Scanlon (R-Red Bank) submitted a bill which aims to supercede the 1949 Retail Gasoline Dispensing Safety Act. The RGDSA has required “trained attendants” to pump gas in the state of New Jersey for the last 68 years.

The Red Bank’s Wild Irishman, ignoring safety concerns, proposes allowing people driving in New Jersey to pump their own gas. If his reckless bill passes, and it looks like it will, Mainers may have to drive all the way to Oregon (pumping their own gas in every intervening state) if they want trained professionals to fill their tanks. New Jersey’s capitulation to incendiary forces will leave only one state with safeguards against flaming gas stations and families roasting inside their cars.

Most Americans now understand that L.G.B.T stands for Lesbian. Gay. Bisexual and Transgendered, but they must come to turns with some bewildering developments in the days to come. The new LGBTQ designation recognizes either “queer” or “questioning” for people who are still trying to interpret the meaning and purposes of their genitalia.

A forward-looking observer of America’s transexualization is putting us on notice that we must prepare for “L.G.B.T.Q.Q.I.P.2S.A.A” ( Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgendered, Queer, Questioning, Intersex, Pansexual, 2-Spirited, Asexual and Ally). Will this lead to constitutional endorsement of polygamous marriages? How could it not, if we are to sanctify the rich variety of caring and committed relationship implied by that all-encompassing acronym?

BREAKING: “Ohio Republicans’ Diabolical Plan For A Poll Tax” ACT NOW TO STOP VICIOUS VOTER SUPPRESSION AND DEFEAT REPUBLICANS ACROSS THE COUNTRY!

I received this urgent message from my friends at the Democratic Governors’ Association just last week and it I feel inspired to stand up in defense of America’s Democratic governors. I’m unshakably convinced that not a single man or woman among them believes that any Republican politician anywhere is plotting to overthrow the United States Constitution and restore poll taxes. The number of ordinary Democrats who sincerely believe that Republicans are systematically “suppressing” voters across the country is probably about equal to the number who believe our voting machines are controlled by Lizard People from Ultima Bagelloxia. Oddly a large number seem willing to pretend to believe in the former scenario.

On May 18 the White House announced a new program called the “Spark Global Entrepreneurship” Coalition. This includes an initiative which ropes in 17 rock stars. I, personally, never heard of the stars named and have no desire to hear them, but that’s not the point. The point is the acronym for the initiative, “Presidential Ambassadors for Global Entrepreneurship,” is real exciting. Let’s pause for a second to admire PAGE. It’s really cool and we will probably near hear of it again.

The hot news from Australia is the feminist wrath Detective Inspector Mick Hughes brought down on his head by his outrageous response to the rape/murder of a 17-year old. To wit: “I suggest to people, particularly females, they shouldn’t be alone in parks — I’m sorry to say that is the case. We just need to be a little bit more careful, a little bit more security conscious.”

“Particularly females!” Can you believe this guy? Columnist Brighette Ryan, writing immediately in The Australian set this crazy cop right:

“Detective Inspector Hughes’ comments were way off in this case. They were patronizing and sexist…If Hughes wanted to send a message at all, it should have been that violence against women will not be tolerated, ever…. Let’s be clear on this — if a woman walks through a park at night and is attacked, it is not her fault. Hell, if a woman walks through a park wearing nothing but her underwear and is attacked, it is not her fault.”

Of course it’s not a woman’s fault if she raped. It’s the rapist’s fault entirely. But Brighette is wrong to write as if correcting that insensitive, oblivious, sexist flatfoot solves the problem. The Australian authorities must erect large signs in prominent places throughout every park advising women that they have a right to walk in those park any time of day or night in any style of dress or undress they choose and if they are raped it won’t be their fault. It will be the rapist’s fault. That will send a message to both the victim and the perpetrator (assuming that he will actually perpetrate after seeing the warning).

The American authorities should do the same, although I’d advise waiting to see how the Australian experiment turns out. It’s usually a good thing to let someone else lead the way. Path breaking can be dangerous. Remember Clovis Sangrail’s dictum: “The earliest Christian gets the fattest lion.”

Professor John Frary of Farmington, Maine is a former US Congress candidate and retired history professor, a Board Member of Maine Taxpayers United and publisher of www.fraryhomecompanion.com and can be reached at: [email protected]