DEAR ABBY: When my beloved Mama died early this year, she left behind hundreds – if not thousands – of dollars worth of various medicines.

My sister and I called every hospital, shelter, clinic and aid agency we could think of, but not one could give medicine to people unless it had come directly from a pharmacy. Finally, someone suggested that we call our veterinarian.

Voila! It turned out that many of the gauzes, tapes, antibiotic and antihistamine creams, pain patches, pills, inhalers, glucose regulators, collection pans, gloves and other miscellaneous items could be used on animals!

Mama would be so pleased to know that we found a good use for her old meds. – IN MEMORY OF MAMA

DEAR “MEMORY”: I loved your idea, so I ran it by the California Veterinary Medical Board, which also thought it was terrific. They explained that certain medical supplies such as gauze tape, collection pans and gloves are welcome donations.

However, numerous state and federal laws prohibit the transfer of prescription or controlled drugs. So antibiotics, antihistamine creams, pain patches, pills and inhalers must be disposed of in compliance with whatever laws and regulations are in place in each state, because they can vary.



DEAR ABBY: When I go out to dinner with men, they usually pick up the check. On occasion, I will insist on reciprocating by buying their meal.

When I go to lunch or dinner with girlfriends, I typically like to pay. I am by no means wealthy, but I’m not struggling with finances either. My problem is one girlfriend in particular who insists on splitting the check. I have always thought that was tacky.

I know the obvious solution would be to let her pay every other time, but she isn’t in a position to treat at some of the restaurants we go to. Am I being overbearing? Or is my girlfriend too old-fashioned? (I’m 24 and she’s 62.) – PICKING UP THE CHECK IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR PICKING: Splitting the check isn’t tacky; it’s common practice. Sometimes the “burden of gratitude” can grow heavy, so instead of arm-wrestling your friend, eat at a less-expensive restaurant, let her pull her own weight, keep her dignity and pay her half of the bill.



DEAR ABBY: My live-in boyfriend “Gary’s” attitude did a complete “180” after we moved in together. He went from being nice and wanting to go out and do things, to spending all the free time he had watching television. He is also not nice to my 7-year-old son.

Because the boy lives here, I have given Gary one year to change his act. Is that too long? I’m not sure I want to continue this relationship, but I can’t afford to live on my own. – DOING POORLY IN PROSPERITY, PA.

DEAR DOING POORLY: Yes, a year is too long. By then, your son may have emotional issues that will cost a fortune to fix. Tell Gary you expect an immediate attitude change or the relationship is over. As to how you will afford to live on your own – think back to what you were doing before you met him. You got along without him before you met him, and you’re going to get along without him now.



Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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