QI was offered a job as a full-time employee and I was very excited about it. But they just called me and changed the terms: Now they want me to start out on a “trial” basis for one month – and after that they’ll decide whether to hire me. I find that very insulting. I have another job offer that’s not as good but at least I won’t be on trial. What do you think I should do?

A. I think you already have decided what to do, and I agree. Adding that condition after the job offer was made isn’t exactly a sign of confidence. You don’t want to start a new job with a chip on your shoulder, no matter how “good” that job is, especially since you obviously are in demand.

And make the job you take an even better one than the first offer you had.

Q. I enjoy my job but now I want to leave. My boss is a nice person but he’s been telling people he thinks I’m attractive and is acting very strangely around me. Normally, I would brush this off and I know nothing will happen because I won’t let it, but I’m so irked by his unprofessional behavior I’m thinking of quitting.

A. Your description of what is happening and how you feel about it is the reason women’s rights advocates worked so hard to include sexual harassment in protective employment laws for women: Unwelcome advances can harm you and your career, especially when your boss may be involved.

But you might want to get advice from an employment lawyer about how to handle this situation and what to ask for if you decide to resign. If the company has 15 or more employees, you’re protected by federal law.

Q. Why don’t people understand that the most pleasant offices in which to work are those where co-workers accommodate each other’s special needs? On occasion, people need time to take care of a sick pet, broken car or elderly parent and to be home so repairs can be made. Empathy isn’t discussed in management circles, but it goes a long way toward creating a good working environment. What do you think?

A. I think you’re right. And it gave me a great deal of pleasure to read your letter. Please, never change!

Carol Kleiman writes for the Chicago Tribune.

Job Game: The New Rules for Finding and Keeping the Job You Want” (Wiley, $16.95). Send e-mail to ckleimantribune.com.)

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(c) 2003, Chicago Tribune.

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