What are you doing Fourth of July week?

There’s nothing conventional about Susie Berry’s celebration. First, she’s getting married. Then she’ll fly to Calgary, Alberta, to meet members of the Canadian family that was forced to give her up for adoption.

Forty-four years ago.

“It’s kind of scary, kind of exciting,” said Berry. “It’s like having a whole new life that I didn’t know about.”

Berry has become good friends with Kleenex. She can’t be sure if the trip will bring closure or a beginning. Between the bursts of joy and excitement, she’s dealing with sadness, feelings of rejection, and wondering what might have been.

The emotional and financial stake is a risk Berry believes she can’t afford not to take. Calgary may hold the final piece of a puzzle that has consumed her since age 4.

“I don’t know what kind of reception my family will give me,” Berry said. “At least they’re curious enough to come meet me.”

Searching for family

Curiosity and coincidence have done wonders for Berry so far. So has computer literacy.

Consider Berry’s track record of gambling on love and winning. Three years ago, she met Steve Crossley of Lewiston on the Internet. Soon, Berry hopped a one-way flight from Texas, the only home she and her teenage daughter had ever known.

Inspired by their chance meeting, the couple tried to locate Berry’s family of origin. Crossley contacted Maury Povich and Oprah Winfrey, with minimal success. Other people-finding services demanded a hefty fee with no guaranteed results.

Six weeks ago, Crossley rebooted and turned to a phone book resource that predated the Web but is now available online: The White Pages.

“I should have done this three years ago,” he said. “I was struck by how easy it was.”

Berry knew her birth name and believed members of that family still lived in Alberta. Crossley’s open-ended search yielded 45 names. Eleven lived in the Greater Calgary area.

Most of us would have bowed out here. It takes enough nerve to reach out and touch someone when he or she isn’t a stranger. But Berry didn’t make it to this crossroads of life by exhibiting a yellow streak.

“What’s the worst they can say? No? They can’t eat you,” Berry said.

Finally, finding a sister

First on the list was a cheerful woman named Brenda. She was divorced from the man with the last name in question – but still friendly, as luck would have it.

Brenda phoned her ex-husband. He in turn called his father, who put him in touch with an uncle. That uncle was Berry’s biological father. He invited Susie to call.

Their conversation led Susie to her sister, Shelly, who had dabbled with the same expensive human search engines that vexed Susie.

“She’s been trying to find me for more than 20 years,” Berry said. “Now we talk on the phone or by instant messenger just about every night.”

“It was quite a thing to hear her speak to her sister for the first time. Very emotional,” Crossley said.

Berry, whose adoptive parents are deceased, expects more hurdles between now and the happy ending.

Susie and Shelly know that the government intervened in their family due to abuse. Shelly, who was younger, stayed in parental custody.

While packing cameras, camcorders and clothes for a week of sightseeing, Berry keeps up her guard.

“My father is not a father to me. He’s just a man I know, someone I can have a friendship with,” Berry said. “Make up for 44 years? You can’t just do that.

“There are things I need to know. I’m big, I’m bold, and now I’m going to be right in front of their face.”

Then the whirlwind of emotions changes direction.

“My daughter just graduated from Lewiston High School,” Berry said. “I’ve been a single mom. She’s never had even one cousin. But she’s fixin’ to have a whole bunch of cousins now.”

Kalle Oakes is staff columnist. He may be reached by e-mail at [email protected].