WICHITA, Kan. – Two years ago, my husband and I adopted our first baby – a little girl we named Abby. She weighed 8 pounds and was covered in black and white fur. Abby, a Border Collie, immediately became the center of attention at our house. We taught her tricks, took her with us nearly everywhere and played ball and Frisbee with her every day. I took her to obedience classes, and my husband took her to agility classes. She had a good life.
Three months ago, our baby Kyle arrived. He also weighed about 8 pounds but without the fur.
Abby’s lifestyle had slowed down a bit before he arrived, and she had been sniffing my belly for several months. She knew something was up.
People kept asking me, “How do you think Abby will be with the baby?” I had no idea. I was worried that she might be jealous or that she might get too excited and be rough with him.
Period of adjustment
When we brought Kyle home, Abby was mostly just happy to see us. When I held Kyle down to show her, she just sniffed him a little, wagged her tail and started begging to play.
At first she kept her distance, unsure of the new little being. Within a few days she was venturing close enough to sniff his head, which always resulted in tail wagging. As she got braver, she added a little lick on the head.
It can take months for a pet to adjust to a new baby in the house, said Jennifer Campbell, director of communications for the Kansas Humane Society.
But preparing a pet in advance for the baby’s arrival can help make that adjustment easier.
Advance preparation
“The best preparation is to start making adjustments ahead of time,” Campbell said. “It won’t be as traumatic for them if the routine has changed before this new little creature becomes part of the family.”
That change in routine has been the hardest adjustment for Abby. She was accustomed to waiting patiently for me each morning as I got dressed and brushed my teeth before we went outside to play.
That’s not our routine anymore. First the baby gets fed and changed, then maybe I get dressed and brush my teeth. And it’s been too cool to take the baby outside. Abby can’t seem to understand and has spent a lot of mornings sitting by the back door with sad eyes.
Campbell suggests changing your pet’s routine two months before the baby is due. If you think your pet’s eating times will change, start changing them ahead of time. If your pet has toys in the house, teach her to distinguish between her toys and baby toys. If certain rooms or parts of the house will be off limits, make them off limits before the baby comes.
“You don’t want the pets to associate new limitations or changes in the routine with the baby,” Campbell said.
To make the transition easier, she also suggests desensitizing pets to babies and baby sounds.
Expose the pet to children and babies, letting the pet sniff babies if possible. Also show your pet what it will be like to be touched by a child.
Campbell recommends playing the “Sounds of Baby” CD (available at www.soundsofbaby.com) at different times during the day and in the middle of the night again starting a couple of months before the baby is due.
If your baby is already home, there are steps you can take to help your pet adjust. If you change your pet’s routine, get it down and stick to the new schedule. Don’t completely ignore your pet when the baby is awake and only give it attention when the baby sleeps. This might cause the pet to become jealous, associating the baby with not getting any attention.
When to get help
Some family pets may view a baby as prey, which can be very dangerous. Campbell said this usually occurs when the pet is not desensitized before the baby arrives. Signs of aggression in dogs can include hyperactivity, eyes hard-focused on the baby, stiff body posture and closed mouth. In cats, the signs can include physical tenseness, body low to the ground and pupils constricted and dilated.
If you see signs of aggression, get help from a professional immediately. Campbell said the problems can usually be corrected with some work.
I had worried about Abby and our baby but could not be happier with how Abby has adjusted. She’s careful and gentle around Kyle and has started putting her toys beside him, hoping that maybe he’ll toss them for her.
Abby provides something black and white for Kyle to stare at and has started joining him for “tummy time,” offering a friendly face and encouraging licks. She’s even tried to “shake” and “give five” a few times.
Maybe Abby knows that someday Kyle will be able to throw a tennis ball for her.
—
(c) 2005, The Wichita Eagle (Wichita, Kan.).
Visit the Eagle on the World Wide Web at http://www.wichitaeagle.com/
Distributed by Knight Ridder/Tribune Information Services.
AP-NY-04-19-05 0619EDT
Send questions/comments to the editors.
Success. Please wait for the page to reload. If the page does not reload within 5 seconds, please refresh the page.
Enter your email and password to access comments.
Hi, to comment on stories you must . This profile is in addition to your subscription and website login.
Already have a commenting profile? .
Invalid username/password.
Please check your email to confirm and complete your registration.
Only subscribers are eligible to post comments. Please subscribe or login first for digital access. Here’s why.
Use the form below to reset your password. When you've submitted your account email, we will send an email with a reset code.