Thoughts to occupy my time while everyone else fights over whether Christmas is too commercial or not commercial enough:

• I don’t know if the Patriots are back, per se, but the team we saw whoop Tampa Bay yesterday looked awfully familiar – the defense pressuring the quarterback with the front seven, forcing mistakes. The offense taking advantage of those mistakes after setting the tone with the opening drive.

It must have made for some uncomfortable viewing for the rest of the AFC contenders.

• Only Red Sox fans would fret over their team trading a backup catcher for an All-Star caliber second baseman.

• The Pacers have reportedly drawn interest from 20 teams seeking to deal for Ron Artest. Numerous NFL teams will be lining up in a few months to get Terrell Owens. And right now, nobody wants to touch Rafael Palmeiro with a 10-foot pole. The lesson is this – if you’re going to betray your teammates, make sure to do it in the prime of your career.

• It looks like the Gavin Kane experiment is having the desired impact in Dixfield. The boys have opened the season with impressive wins over Monmouth, Telstar and Georges Valley. The Cougars’ first true test will come next Thursday, when they travel to Boothbay, whom many favor to win Western C. I’m just wondering whether Gavin is going to have time to do any Christmas shopping, though.

• The good news is the Bruins were 3-2-1 since the Joe Thornton trade going into last night’s game in Calgary. The bad news is they’ve only scored 15 goals in those six games, and Sergei Samsonov and Glen Murray aren’t exactly threatening to burn out any lamps. Jumbo Joe, meanwhile, is on pace for close to 200 points.

• If the Yankees want to sign Nomar, more power to em. Let them take all the Red Sox retreads they can fit on the roster. Hopefully Kevin Millar is next on their wish list.

• Rumor has it Grady Little already has a letter of apology drafted in case the Dodgers score more than 10 runs against somebody this year.

• I met Brian Scalabrine this past summer at the annual Seeds of Peace basketball clinic. Nice guy. But if I knew he was going to be this bad for the Celtics, I’d have challenged him to a game of HORSE and spotted him the H-O-R.

• Hey, Rumford, don’t blame me. I had Travis Fergola on my Fitzy ballot.

• The Colts are putting together one of the greatest regular seasons in NFL history. But I’m not putting them in the running for the Greatest of All Time until I see a Tony Dungy/Peyton Manning-led team run the table in the playoffs.

• Doug Mientkiewicz and Mark Grudzielanek have signed with the Kansas City Royals. Note to self: Do not apply for baseball beat job in Kansas City.

• Fear not, ladies. Johnny Damon will be back in a Red Sox uniform next year. Mark my words.

• It seems only fitting that Alex Rodriguez would take the easy way out and decide against playing in the World Baseball Classic, for fear that he would offend either American or Dominican fans by choosing to play for one country over the other. A-Rod, I won’t be offended if you play for the Dominican Republic. Given your history of success, it might be the best thing you ever do for your fellow Americans.

• It happens every year. I convince myself that a legitimate playoff system would make me care about college football again. Then I come home late from work one night, turn on ESPN 8, and sit down for the fourth quarter of the Diamond-Cialis-Ovaltine-Slim Jim-Pabst Blue Ribbon Weedeater Bowl presented by Uncle Henry’s pitting Marshall against Central Florida. And then I realize the last thing I need in my life is to start paying attention to college football.

• Who will decide to come back first, Roger Clemens or Theo Epstein? I’ve got Theo, by a week.

• Nothin’ says Christmas in Maine like plugging in a neon palm tree and putting it on the front lawn.

Randy Whitehouse is a staff writer. He can be reached by e-mail at [email protected]