DEAR ABBY: I found a box of Viagra in my husband’s pants pocket while I was sorting the laundry. The box had a prescription label with the date and his name printed on it.

My husband and I share the same bed, but have not been intimate for more than 15 years. Our marriage is a marriage of convenience, not love. We are barely civil to each other.

From experience, I know that if I confront him, he will lie and fabricate a story. This is the second time in five years that I have found Viagra. Where do I go from here? – ANGRY BEYOND WORDS, OTTAWA, CANADA

DEAR ANGRY BEYOND WORDS: The first place you should go is somewhere quiet, where you can cool your anger and ask yourself some important questions:

(1) Why have I tolerated a loveless marriage of convenience for more than 15 years?

(2) Am I better off with this man or without him?

Once you have answered those questions, you will know whether to consult a marriage counselor or a lawyer.

P.S. Freud said there is no such thing as an “accident.” If you decide to reveal to your husband that you found the stash he left in his pocket, would you please let me know what kind of lies he fabricates? I’m sure my readers are as curious as I am about what kind of story he can come up with.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend (age 17) and I (age 14) are having “issues.” Lately he’s always pushing me around, telling me what to do and exactly how to do it. I try my best, but sometimes it doesn’t cut it for him – and I just don’t know what to do.

I want to salvage our relationship, so sometimes I try talking about it. But he either doesn’t want to listen or blames everything that goes wrong on me. The only time he’s ever actually nice is when he wants to have sex, or think about it, or talk about it. I’m really uncomfortable with this, and I told him that. Then he “sweet talks” me, and I stand firm, but he just gets angry and hostile.

I know at our age we are going through so many hormonal changes, but I still don’t think it’s a good excuse for his immature behavior. But I love him soooo much – and I’m just so lost! What can I do to keep our relationship from going over the edge? – IN LOVE IN ANDERSON, S.C.

DEAR IN LOVE: Although you say you love this young man, he is not acting like someone who loves YOU. The behavior you describe is abusive and coercive, and if you continue to tolerate it, it will land you in serious trouble. You may “love” him, but you have to take care of yourself – and the surest way to keep the relationship from going “over the edge” is to end it.

DEAR ABBY: I’m a 24-year-old graduate student, and I’m currently planning my wedding. I don’t own a cell phone. When I try to arrange plans with people or contact various wedding vendors, they’ll ask for my cell phone number to get ahold of me later. When I reply that I don’t have one, they act annoyed – as if I’m inconveniencing them because they might not be able to get ahold of me the instant they call.

Abby, when I’m not at home I am usually someplace where I wouldn’t answer a cell phone anyway, so I don’t think it makes a difference if I have one or not. How do I reply to people who are astonished that someone could possibly get by without a cell phone attached to her hip? – CELL-LESS IN WISCONSIN

DEAR CELL-LESS: Smile and say, “Just call me an old- fashioned girl.” You are not obligated to explain further.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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