Little big league

Alex Rodriguez infuriated the Blue Jays by shouting something that the shortstop and third baseman heard as “Mine!” and causing a ninth-inning pop-up to drop in Wednesday night. Worse yet was Toronto hitters hearing, “No batter, no batter, no batter, SWING!” from third base every time they stepped in the box.

GOOD KNICKS TIX STILL AVAILABLE FOR $12

New York State is in the process of making it completely legal to scalp sports tickets on the Internet. It would have so much easier to poke fun if they had pushed to make prostitution or pot permissible first.

SUPPLY WHERE THERE IS NO DEMAND

Mark Cuban is part of a group plotting a Friday night pro football league to compete with the NFL. Figures he’d be too proud to call Larry Csonka, Donald Trump or Vince McMahon and do a little market research.

MILLIONAIRES VS. BILLIONAIRES

Raiders WR Jerry Porter has decided not to change his uniform number from 84 to 81 after learning he would be forced to reimburse Reebok $210,000 for the cost of unsold souvenir jerseys. Not sure which part of that story is most ridiculous.

COST-BENEFIT ANALYSIS

Joey Porter pleaded no contest and settled on a $1,000 fine for punching fellow NFL player Levi Jones in an off-field incident. Oh, to be an athlete and above the law. I can think of at least a dozen people for whom I’d even pony up two grand for one, uncontested swing.

VACATION, ALL HE EVER WANTED

Kentucky Derby winner Street Sense won’t run the Belmont Stakes in order to prepare for the Travers Stakes and Breeders’ Cup Classic. The Breeders’ Cup is October Freaking 27th. And I thought Tiger Woods was a wimp for skipping every small-market PGA tournament.

Deceptive speed

Venus Williams’ record-setting serve of 128 mph at the French Open was exciting news for the feminist crowd. They’re currently searching for 55-year-old Roscoe Tanner in hopes of setting up an exhibition match to prove gender “superiority.”


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