The Cubs traded catcher Michael Barrett to the Padres because he couldn’t get along with Cubs pitchers. Here’s some advice for Barrett to get off on the right foot with at least one Padre. Brign a case of Heineken and a stripper to the ballpark before David Wells’ first start.

King for a day

The Sacramento Kings have hired Reggie Theus as their new head coach. Some of you might remember Theus as the preening, Jheri-curled gunner for the pre-Jordan Bulls. Others might remember him playing a basketball coach on the Saturday morning tweener series “Hang Time.” Five years from now, it’s unlikely anyone will remember he coached the Sacramento Kings.