PROBLEM:

Your preschooler loves to run around the house naked. Should you make her or him cover up when other grown-ups are coming over?

PARENT ADVICE:

“I let my preschoolers run around naked just before and after their baths in the evening only. We called it their streaking time. They got their time to be naked, and the rest of the time, they learned it wasn’t appropriate to be naked in front of other adults.”

  — Marie Grass Amenta

“It would depend on who was coming over. I made dinner for my parents’ 57th anniversary, and our 4-year-old son had taken a bath because he was sweaty from playing outside and just didn’t want to wear any clothes afterward. So he ate dinner with all of us — naked. Completely naked. I pick my battles. … However, if it’s not a family member, I would have him cover up.”

— Jennifer Amen Tomka

“You could say, ‘Mommy doesn’t let visitors see her naked, and you can’t either. When we have visitors, we wear clothes because our private parts are only for our own eyes.’ Obviously, wearing clothing doesn’t protect a child from predators, but it is an initial step in educating children about respect for their bodies, safe touch by others (e.g., bathroom wiping) and personal hygiene – I don’t want the gamble of a bad wipe-job landing on someone’s lap!”

— Paula Glenn

“We try to make it fun by telling the boys that guests are coming over, so we’re going to have a party. And when we have a party, we all have to wear our ‘party clothes.’ We try to make these clothes especially cool, like Hawaiian shirts. Now, even when a delivery driver rings the doorbell, our 5-year-old asks, ‘Should I go put on my party shirt?”‘

—Jana Petersen

EXPERT ADVICE:
Anne Oxenreider, a writer for sixtysecondparent.com, says that a certain degree of family nakedness is healthy because it can foster a positive body image. You can be confident your preschooler possesses that if she or he is willing to dash around naked with company around.

“This seems like a good opportunity to teach appropriate modesty,” Oxenreider says. “Consider setting up boundaries for nudity. You might say to your daughter that it is always OK to be naked in the bathrooms and the bedrooms, just not in the living room and kitchen. If that seems too restrictive, keep a child-size robe or large T-shirt someplace handy for when someone drops by.”

Diane Debrovner, health and psychology editor at Parents magazine, points out that lots of young kids like to hang out naked – even in front of guests — simply because it feels more comfortable to them.

“A child’s nudity doesn’t have sexual overtones, but she certainly may be more likely to strip down if she sees that it gets a reaction from you — regardless of whether you laugh or insist she get dressed,” Debrovner says.

If you’re uncomfortable when your child is exposed, simply set some new rules, telling her that it’s no longer OK to walk around naked or in her underwear. If she asks why, you can explain that what was appropriate at age 2 is no longer acceptable at age 4 or 5.

“You might say, ‘When you were 1, you drank from a bottle. When you became big enough, we taught you to drink from a cup. Someday we’ll even teach you how to drive a car,”‘ Debrovner says. “But play it cool, rather than making a big deal when she’s naked or partially clothed. Praise her for the good job she does getting dressed in the morning. If she senses that her nudity makes you uneasy, she’ll be more likely to turn the situation into a power struggle.”

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