Did You Know?

Did You Know is a brand new segment of Talk of the Town. I’d use one of those trademark symbols if I had any clue how it’s done. And anyway, this brand new segment is going to appear just this once so what’s the point? And now on to today’s Did You Know?

Did you know that Joatmon Drive in Auburn was named by a man who owned property in the area and that it stands for Jack Of All Trades, Master Of None? Now you know, thanks to observant reader Judy Baird of Lewiston, who will receive a copy of of the Sun Journal for sending it along. Provided she has a subscription. Send your Did You Know items along and qualify to win equally awesome prizes. Your facts don’t even need to be true, since we don’t use that trademark thingy.

In defense of the Livermore Falls town manager

Who apparently went all Tarantino when he lost his wallet at a meeting. Although when you get right down to it, how ugly could a fight among selectmen be? What’s the dude going to do, threaten to table your resolution? Knee you in the AVCOG?

But my point is this: losing a wallet is among the most traumatizing things a guy will ever experience. I think losing part of his anatomy would be less horrifying. Lose your wallet and you face a long period of dealing with credit companies, the department of motor vehicles (which alone is worse than a vasectomy), insurance agents, the movie stores, etc. All that and there’s still the possibility that some lunatic is going to use your identification to check into sleazy motels and leave a trail of dead hookers up and down the East Coast.

So yeah, it sounds like the fellow went all Roadhouse in the parking lot at town hall, but I say cut the brother some slack. Because as spelled out above, losing a wallet is just a huge pain in the AVCOG.

Tip of the week

You know what makes a nice, inexpensive gift for just about any occasion? A gift card from Dunkin Donuts, from a fine restaurant or a movie theater. And I’m not talking about any financial value here, I’m talking about just the card, which you can pick up for nothing. Your friend or loved one will be thrilled to get it and the expression on his face when he tries to make a purchase? Well, you just can’t buy something as joyous as that.

These weekly tips are sure to enrich your life and leave you friendless. No need to thank me, just pay it forward.

A cooling off period

Somewhere in the Twin Cities on Wednesday, a woman called police to report her unhappiness about her boyfriend showering with a neighbor. Who calls the cops for that?

The more adult thing to do would be to slip into the basement of the home where the illicit bathing is happening, shut down the water heater and enjoy the screams from above.

Trust me here. When the neighbor lady gets a look at Romeo in cold water, he won’t be invited back.

mlaflamme@sunjournal.com

Copy the Story Link