DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend, “Jake,” dumped me two years ago. Since then, we have tried to remain friends. He texts or calls to check up on me, tells me he misses me, calls me pet names and recites lines from my favorite movies.

Although I appreciate Jake’s efforts to stay friends, I’m confused because he was the one who broke off our relationship. He has said in the past that letting me go is something he will always regret, but he hasn’t made an attempt to get back together.

Abby, I feel that Jake is stringing me along. I enjoy our friendship, but in my heart I’ll always want more. I can’t shake the feeling that he still loves me. At what point should I just give up and let go? — LEFT HANGING IN HOUSTON

DEAR LEFT HANGING: How about right now? But before you do, tell Jake that this “friendship” has prolonged the pain of your breakup, that what you feel for him isn’t platonic — and you will always want more. If he does still love you, it will be his opening to declare himself. However, if he doesn’t, then for your sake, cut the cord, because you won’t be free to find someone else until you do.

DEAR ABBY: I was married in Las Vegas six months ago in a quickie wedding so my husband could put me on his health insurance. I used my late grandmother’s ring for the ceremony, assuming that “Harry” would buy one for me shortly. It still hasn’t happened, and he makes it very clear he doesn’t intend to. Harry claims we don’t have any money. However, we are buying a house, and he constantly spends money on his hobbies.

I am starting to regret the whole package — not having a real wedding, no ring, no proposal. I am so resentful I am considering ending our marriage over it. I need to know if there’s a way to fix this. — RINGLESS IN RICHMOND, TEXAS

DEAR RINGLESS: When most mature couples marry, they have gotten to know each other well enough to know if their values and priorities are similar. Apparently, you and Harry tied the knot so quickly there wasn’t time for that to happen. A way to “fix this” would be through marriage counseling — provided you and Harry are willing to spend the money that way. Please suggest it.

DEAR ABBY: After my wife’s funeral, many of our friends returned to the mortuary to collect the flowers they had sent. Some of them were very rude, insisting that because they had sent them, the flowers belonged to them.

This has upset our daughter, who was in charge of sending thank-you notes. Now she doesn’t know who sent what because we were too distracted to look at the cards on the flowers. Is this something new, or are those people just rude? — WIDOWER IN LIVINGSTON, MONT.

DEAR WIDOWER: When flowers have been sent — whether for a birthday or for an occasion like a funeral — they are no longer the property of the sender. They belong to whomever they were sent to. What your “many friends” did was insensitive and rude.

As to what your daughter should say in her thank-you notes, I suggest a short message to those who signed the memorial book at the funeral service: “Our family thanks you for attending Mother’s funeral, and for your compassion during this sad time. Your thoughtfulness is deeply appreciated.”

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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