DEAR ABBY: I was recently fired from my job for chronic tardiness. I have worked at this business for four years, and although I knew my lateness was seen as a problem by my boss, it was still a surprise.

Now that I’m back in the job market again, I’m wondering if I need to mention my previous tardiness on employment applications. I asked my mother, who has been privy to this whole mess. She thinks I should mention it and explain that I have learned my lesson — especially when applying to a different branch of my former company that would have direct access to my evaluations.

I think I should explain my tardiness as a “lesson learned” on job interviews when/if it comes up, not on applications where I am trying to put my best foot forward. What say you? — TARDY FOR WORK

DEAR TARDY: While I think your mother may mean well, I agree with YOU!

DEAR ABBY: When I was little I would have given anything to have met my father at least once. Now I am 26 and have a 2-year-old boy, “Sean.” I am married, but not to his father (a man I’ll call Charlie).

All of a sudden, Charlie is wanting to be in Sean’s life, but Sean already knows my husband as his daddy. I’m confused and afraid. What’s your advice? I don’t want to confuse my little boy about the man who is raising him and his biological father, but I don’t want to wait ’til Sean is older and cause him pain. — MOM IN TENNESSEE

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DEAR MOM: It appears that Bio-Dad is a little slow on the uptake. Now that he wants to be part of Sean’s life, he should also be paying child support if he doesn’t already, so discuss this with a lawyer.

Charlie should be introduced to Sean by his name for now. When the boy is old enough to understand — in a year or two — he should then be told that he has two dads and that he’ll be sharing time with both of them because they both love him.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and a half. Last Thanksgiving I invited him — and he attended — my family’s get-together. Of course, I invited him again this year.

However, his rich sister and brother-in-law are treating his family to Thanksgiving dinner at a nice restaurant. I was not invited.

My feelings are hurt, but I’m not sure I’m justified in feeling that way. Should I just get over it since I’m not actually a member of their family? — UNINVITED IN MISSOURI

DEAR UNINVITED: If you’re smart, you’ll be gracious about this. While it would have been nice if the sister had included you, you and your boyfriend are not engaged — and the sister may have wanted the dinner to be “strictly family.” As the hostess, that is her privilege.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.


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