It’s possible Shopping Siren has a touch of cabin fever.

The presidential campaign fighting is getting to me. (Both parties, all candidates, any topic.) The mud is annoying. (Who thought I’d miss snow?) And my car is making a funny sort of ka-thunk, which turns road trips into rousing games of let’s-find-a-mechanic. (Aw, car.)

It’s time to put February in the history books.

Thankfully, 2016 is pretty much the Year of Wicked Cool Stuff to Look Forward To in Maine.

Like country/rock/island escapism? There’s a concert for that. Comedy? Laugh it up!

Murder mystery pirate dinner? Aye, matey. And you won’t even have to swab the deck.

There’s an adult prom for the teenager in us all — Adult. Prom. — and a Broadway-level magic show to wow our inner wizard.

It’s enough to make even the pain of car repairs a little more bearable.

Aarrgh.

• “Who Killed Jolly Roger?” March 19, Best Western Merry Manor Inn, South Portland, $50

You’ve heard of murder mystery dinner theater? Now add pirates.

Shiver me timbers!

Just in case you can’t bring yourself to tell your significant other that you’ve spent $100 on two tickets to eat dinner with funny-yet-murderous pirates from Poland Spring-based Mystery For Hire, take heart. It’s a fundraiser for the Lafayette Family Cancer Center in Brewer. So go knowing you’re doing something good, matey. 

• The Maine Home Show, March 19 and 20, Androscoggin Bank Colisee, Lewiston, $5

This two-day Lewiston show gathers up builders, contractors, local home improvement stores, appliance dealers and other home experts and puts them all in one convenient place. Just for you. And your next-door neighbors. Who will be adding a swimming pool this summer, heads up. I hear they like chocolate chip cookies if you want to start getting in good with them. 

• The Illusionists, April 15 and 16, Merrill Auditorium, Portland, $52 to $127

Sign up for Merrill Auditorium’s email list and save 5 percent on your first ticket order. Which is good, because this live-from-Broadway magic show looks amazing. If you like that sort of thing. If you REALLY like that sort of thing, you can pop for Gold Circle seating, which costs $127 a ticket and gets you a seat in the first five rows, a magic kit and a meet-and-greet. PortTix doesn’t say precisely who you get to meet and greet, but I’m betting it’s an illusionist. Or Fred the usher. One of those.

• Jerry Seinfeld, May 6, Merrill Auditorium, $74 to $159

What’s the deal with funnyman Jerry Seinfeld? Now you can find out.

• African Adventure Tales, May 22, The Public Theatre, Lewiston, $10 ($5 for kids)

Folk tales told with puppets! Perfect for kids 4 to 10 years old. And parents who need a short break from kids 4 to 10 years old.

• “August: Osage County,” June 3-12, Community Little Theatre, Auburn, $18 (discounts for kids and seniors)

This Pulitzer Prize-winning play — turned into a 2013 movie starring Meryl Streep and Julia Roberts — focuses on the struggles of a large, dysfunctional Midwestern family when they reunite in the wake of the father’s disappearance. Your own family will look angelic by comparison.

• So. Much. Music, summer dates, Darling’s Waterfront Pavilion, Bangor, prices vary

The Bangor waterfront is going to be filled with the sound of music this summer. So far, 16 concerts in 13 weeks, including Dixie Chicks (June 16), Hall & Oates (July 14) and Jimmy Buffett (Aug. 18.)

For country fans who can’t choose between Dierks Bentley (June 4) and Toby Keith (July 21), good news! There’s a “megaticket” that will get you into all eight of the summer’s country concerts. It costs $225 to $580 per ticket, depending on whether you want to sit on the back lawn or get close enough for Kenny Chesney to sweat on you. That’s a personal decision between you and your dry cleaner.

• Tess Gerritsen, Aug. 17, Gray Public Library, free 

Bestselling author and Mainer Tess Gerritsen is touring the world this year to promote her new thriller, “Playing with Fire.” Lucky for us, she’s hopping back home between stops in the United Kingdom and Germany. Her Gray talk is free and open to the public, but check as the date approaches to see if you need to reserve a spot. Unless you really want to fly to Germany to see her. In which case, auf wiedersehen.

Best find: Prom Night, April 8, Dolard and Priscilla Gendron Franco Center, Lewiston, $35

Prom night! For adults! The evening includes things you had at your prom (chaperones, dancing, coronation of prom king and queen) and things you most certainly did not (bar, buffet dinner). The April 9 Prom Night has already sold out, so get your tickets for April 8 while you still can.

This time around, you won’t have to pretend to run out of gas on the way home.

Think twice: About not planning something

Because political ads are just starting, mud season has a ways to go yet and the car is never completely weird-noise-free.

Shopping Siren’s true identity is protected by a pair of stylish, sweater-wearing Doberman pinschers (who want to learn to drive like those dogs in the Subaru ads) and the Customer Service counter at the Sun Journal. You can reach her at shoppingsiren@sunjournal.com.

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