I know this has no bearing on you or your life. It’s just that I’ve been on vacation the past week and I have no idea what’s going on locally. Also, Mila Kunis has been asked to describe Ashton Kutcher’s manhood. If THIS has any bearing on you or your life, seek help.
Pow!
Got the following message through Facebook the other day: “I saw Batman today walking by East Avenue in Lewiston. Thought you would like to know.” I skipped on over to East Ave in search of the bat-faced hero, but never found him. I DID, however, have that stupid theme in my head the rest of the night. The one that goes “Na na na na na na na na, Batman! Na na na na na na na, Batman!”
BAP!
I may have inadvertently left out a “na” in the above musical score. I apologize for this disruption to your earworm.
Al Dente
Another lady sent along a photo and information about a fire hydrant in Auburn that was oozing not one, but TWO different types of pasta. No, really. Unfortunately, the photo was two years old, so no free Italian dinner for us.
Seeing things
Speaking of fine dining, did anybody know that Bugaboo Creek in Portland had closed down? No? Me either. I found out by pulling into an empty lot while my stomach groaned for prime rib. The steak joint is closed for good. No more talking moose, no more flopping fish, no more chattering otter creeping up out of the shrubbery. Wait, all those things were real, right? Tell me you saw them, too!
The colors!
Speaking of hallucinations, I saw a photo of a bee and a butterfly snacking on an Eastern purple coneflower in the newspaper the other day and thought I had accidentally ingested mescaline again (it happens). Turns out it was just another Russ Dillingham nature photo. Dillingham is a total trip, yo.
Make it PokeStop!
I swear this is the last thing I’ll say about Pokemon Go. Until, you know, I’m desperate to fill a couple inches of column space again. I had a chance to witness the game up close and personal the other day and I’m here to tell you that it’s even dumber in reality than it sounds in all those news accounts. There is no point whatsoever to the game and the imagery is like a bad hallucination. Or, you know, a Russ Dillingham photo.
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