Light snow, freezing fog

This was a description of the day’s weather in the NOAA forecast that greeted me first thing Monday. Seriously, is this a real thing? I’m still getting used to the polar vortex and now we have freezing fog? It sounds like a weather condition that might exist on one of the moons of Pluto. What other alliterative weather do we have bearing down on us, I wonder? Sizzling snow? Flyblown frost? Wry Neck wind? Scalding sleet? Carnivorous cold? Murderous mist? Hell hail? Sometimes I think that all weather forecasters are frustrated sci-fi writers at heart.

Flush with pride

Demented artist Bill Eldridge has unleashed another sketch of me in action – this time he has me standing knee-deep in the ghastly water of a clogged toilet. The detail in Eldridge’s art is downright amazing, but I’m also starting to worry that his work might be prescient, as well. He draws a picture of me half submerged in a toilet and that’s exactly the kind of week I had.

Take a look around

Have you seen staff photomeister Russ Dillingham’s foray into 3D photography yet? In his newest footage, the viewer is able to scroll his way around the video landscape, checking out the action in a full 360-degree circle. One can even finger the screen up or down to view the sky and ground, respectively. You’d think this is possible through some grand new technology, but nope. Russ Dillingham is so ferocious, he simply wills an ordinary camera to film in all directions and by God, it does it. If you were a piece of camera equipment would YOU argue with the fearsome Russ Dillingham? I didn’t think so.

Off the hook

I called somebody on the phone the other day and got a busy signal. A busy signal! It was an immediate and vivid flashback to the ’80s, a time when a lad would hear that hateful, throbbing buzzing and burn with jealousy, wondering who his girlfriend might be talking to all that time. You don’t suppose she’s talking to that snotty new kid, do you? No. Leeanne wouldn’t do that. Or would she? Harlot! Maybe you ought to call Yvonne from up the block and see if she wants to go hang out at the Dream Machine for a while. That’ll give Leeanne something to think about.

Dooooonuts

Lately I’ve become appreciative of the coffee at Cumberland Farms – not just the hot, brewed stuff that can be had for a buck a cup but the ground coffee that comes in bags. I cold brew that stuff at home and it’s just delightful. The more intoxicating news out of Cumby’s these days, though, comes out of the donut case. They’ve got these chocolate frosted donuts with a sprinkling of nuts that are so good, I think I might eventually need rehab to get off them. Not that I have a problem. I can quit anytime I want.

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