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From left, Ben Skiest, David Sparks, Nicholas Meyerson and Julian Cook chat Saturday while having lunch at Veterans Memorial Park in Lewiston. The Bates College seniors live off campus and said they have kept a small social circle, exercise indoors and wash their hands “a lot” to minimize their risk of the coronavirus. “I feel it is safer to stay here rather than fly back home,” said Meyerson of Los Angeles. The students will start online classes Monday. Daryn Slover/Sun Journal Buy this Photo
LEWISTON – Feeling stir crazy? Tired of working, eating and entertaining at home? Miss your church group? Your Bingo games? Your Friday night poker with the boys?
Try sending a care package to someone who might need it. Scribble an old-fashioned, handwritten letter to a pen pal. Adopt a cat or commit a random act of kindness and maybe it will catch on.
Erin Guay, the executive director at Healthy Androscoggin has been thinking a lot lately about the matter of social distancing. With a background in public health, Guay has come to realize that in many ways, social health can be as important as physical or mental health.
With the concept of social distancing riding high in everybody’s mind right now, Guay believes it’s more important than ever to help people cope.
“We’re all in the same position now, right?” Guay said. “We’re socially distancing and trying to figure out how to stay healthy and sane.”
While compiling a list of things people might do to cope with isolation, Guay hearkened back to the Ice Storm of 1998. With power out everywhere and a lot of folks trapped in their homes, random acts of kindness became a way of life across Maine.
“What came out of that was people were more connected to their neighbors,” Guay said. “And so, even though I didn’t want to actually go to my neighbor’s house, I gave one of them a call. She happens to be an older lady, so I just offered a helping hand to say, like, if you need anything at the grocery store, let me know. I’ve seen a lot of people doing that.”
Her list also includes a range of smaller ideas meant to help a person survive and even thrive in relative isolation. That includes a suggestion that instead of just dashing off emails, people might think about getting back to the quaint art of handwritten letters.
“That can be so much more special,” she said. “I have a an 8-year-old son and he has a pen pal who lives in Pennsylvania. And so they’re getting back to writing letters back and forth to one another. I think that’s just a good reminder for people of all ages.”
Random acts of kindness, too, can be undertaken from a safe distance. Guay’s first thought was to help local small businesses by buying a gift certificate, even if it has to be done online and anonymously. Simple things like that, she said, not only help someone else, it can improve your mood and create a feeling of empowerment.
“Just being able to give back to people, right now when they’re struggling, I think makes us all feel closer,” Guay said.
Still restless and bored? Why not utilize your own personal skill set by putting together an instructional video, be it a piano lesson, a baking recipe, or a step-by-step guide to how to repair a leaky faucet. Current or former teachers can put together online lessons, as Guay’s own mother did for her grandchildren.
Social media, Guay says, can be a blessing for sure, although it’s important for people to know their limits.
“My perspective on that is social media can be really great and it can also be loneliness invoking,” she said, “if you’re just sort of scrolling through and you feel like you’re missing out on things. And that could be difficult. But at the same time, if you’re able to make some more connections, or watch a video of different ideas for something you could do, if you’re able to sort of take it to the next level and make it an area of connectedness, then it can be helpful.
As an example, Guay said she knows of one group of professionals who have been doing virtual coffee chats to stay connected while working from home.
“So they’re setting a time to do like a Zoom call and everybody’s just showing up with a cup of coffee and no particular agenda,” Guay said, “but just the time for groups get together and sort of talk about what’s going on and bring ideas or just share.”
Cats and dogs don’t get the coronavirus, as it turns out. And with the Greater Androscoggin Humane Society still in need of homes for their animals, Guay suggests it might be the perfect time to adopt. Just having a new pet around can provide an obvious emotional uplift, she said, but if someone has a dog that needs to be walked, it’s also encouragement to get outside once in a while.
Most importantly, Guay said, people should remember that although they might feel cooped up and isolated, they’re not really alone.
“I think just remembering that there are people out there who care about you,” Guay said, “because it can seem so isolating when you’re not seeing them. Just remember how many people that you’re actually connected to.”
Sun Journal readers seem to be coping with isolation, although there is bound to be some grumbling as the coronavirus crisis stretches out from days to weeks and possibly months.
“I’m angry that I cannot have my hair done, or my nails,” groused Pamela Webber Carrier, of Auburn. “What am I going to look like when I CAN go out? My skin is getting creepy from the stuffed up house.”
“Yesterday I had to get out,” said Kimberly Leonard Brenton, a former Auburn woman now living in Ellsworth. She went to Walmart to pick up a few supplies and then treated herself to an ice cream from the Dairy Queen drive-through.
“I have to say, most of us are taking it seriously,” Brenton said. “But people like me who have anxiety depression and seasonal affective disorder do need to get out. Especially on sunny days.”
Lin Prescott, of Auburn, is a former school teacher who was used to being surrounded by 25-30 kids at a time each day. She misses the kids, she said, but with social distancing suddenly all the rage, she’s figuring out that she’s OK with her own company, too.
“I do miss them sometimes,” she said of her students, “but have time to read, craft, play games online, clean out my closets, take picture of birds and chat live with friends.”
For some, though, there will be loneliness. With that in mind, Tri-County Mental Health Services has been encouraging people to talk to loved ones on the phone, Skype or just stay connected through emails. Those who have nobody close to contact can call The Intentional Warm Line, a toll-free support line for adults offering conversations with a peer specialist with experience in mental health recovery, at 866-771-9276.
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Friends from left, Ben Skiest, David Sparks, Nicholas Meyerson and Julian Cook chat Saturday while having lunch at Veterans Memorial Park in Lewiston. The Bates College seniors live off campus and said they have kept a small social circle, exercise indoors and wash their hands “a lot” to minimize their risk of the coronavirus. “I feel it is safer to stay here rather than fly back home,” said Meyerson of Los Angeles. The students will start online classes Monday. Daryn Slover/Sun Journal
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