It’s been said that most people will change and improve their life based on one of two motivations: inspiration or desperation.
It seems as if it is so much easier, at least in the short term, to live our lives motivated by desperation.
We put things off until we are forced to deal with them, and then deal with them poorly, since we are so stressed by the situation. Then the crisis is averted and we go back to doing the same old thing until the next crisis.
How to live by desperation:
• be a gifted procrastinator
• focus your energy on the urgent, yet unimportant things in life
• give up your power to choose and just let life happen to you
• blame others for your situation and take no responsibility at all
• remember, blame is spelled “b lame”
How to live by inspiration:
I read a quote by Richard Bach the other day that went something like this – “You have spent your entire lifetime becoming the person you are right now. Was it worth it?” Yikes, that’s a tough one. When used correctly though, it can inspire you.
Here are some tips on living by inspiration:
Realize – “get it” – that at the end, your life will either be an explanation or an exclamation. Live and choose accordingly.
• Get things done! The opposite of “I’ll just do that later” is “There is no time like the present.”
• Focus your energy on the important things is life, which most of the time are important but not urgent
• Consider how a car is designed. Cars have a small rear view mirror and a huge windshield, to be used in that proportion. Live in that proportion as well.
• Be a chooser. Even in the most rarest of times when you have very limited choices about what is happening to you and/or around you, you can still always choose your attitude.
• Take responsibility for where you are right now. In the 80s, I worked in a drug rehab center for teenagers. One of the frequent sayings was “your best efforts at life got you here.” Ouch. Yet you can take responsibility for this and then …
It’s been said that one of the best ways to predict the future is to create it. Create yours when and where you can.
As you read this you might be saying “Yeah, that all sounds good, but it’s just too late for me to do anything about it.” While it may be late in the game for you, it is still up to you whether it is too late or not.
Jeff Herring, MS, LMFT, is a marriage and family therapist.
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