Two losing weeks in a row, huh?

At least now I know what Urban Meyer feels like.

Then again, the Florida coach and alleged offensive genius is one of the guys who cost me so dearly in the fourth quarter last week. Maybe he should hire a defensive genius.

This week’s slate promises equal devastation to my winning percentage, with far too many good teams running through the tunnel as road underdogs.

Sigh. Onward and upward.

LSU at Kentucky – Until the Wildcats beat the Bayou Bengals again (which could be never), Kentucky will forever face the stigma of that game in which its players doused then-coach Guy Morriss with Gatorade, only to watch LSU win on a Hail Mary. Kentucky got a reminder last week that it’s still a basketball school, losing to South Carolina. LSU received two memos – one delivered in person by Florida, the other signed by Stanford out in Los Angeles – that being No. 1 isn’t some sort of entitlement. That won’t make this road trip any easier. LSU, 35-31.

Missouri at Oklahoma – Missouri still hasn’t played anybody. Heck, USC even shredded Nebraska. The Sooners, meanwhile, get style points for beating a Texas team that probably isn’t as a good as Michigan but is still hovering in the Top 25 because it hasn’t lost to a school from Boone, N.C., yet. Oklahoma, 38-28.

Oregon State at California – Before the pundits start breaking down Cal film as it relates to LSU in a potential BCS Championship game, be reminded that the Bears must travel to Arizona State and host ticked-off Southern Cal. Oh, and then there’s Stanford. Why not just throw this game and get it over with? California, 42-24.

Wisconsin at Penn State – Joe Paterno proved this week he’s still spry enough to whip misbehaving players with his walker. It remains to be seen if he remains capable of coaching up a Nittany Lions unit that isn’t as good as we thought they were against a Badgers bunch that might be better than we think they are. Well, he’s still Joe Pa, and the game’s in Happy Valley. Penn State, 13-3.

Auburn at Arkansas – Reason No. 9,352 why in-season polls are stupid, mine included: Tigers have played the toughest schedule in the nation, and second isn’t close. The thought of them looking up at Missouri, Arizona State or Kansas in anyone’s rankings is ludicrous. Even the betting houses don’t get it, with Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday’s flow of money favoring the Razorbacks, despite the fact that they haven’t beaten anybody of consequence since last November. Upset special #1 Auburn, 20-12.

Louisville at Cincinnati – Cardinals and Atlanta Falcons fans alike wonder if it’s too late for Bobby Petrino to come back. This begins a stretch of truth serum games for the Bearcats, who also have Connecticut, South Florida and West Virginia between now and Thanksgiving. Cincinnati, 35-30.

Connecticut at Virginia – Speaking of the Huskies, here are two teams that are a combined 10-1. Better living through puff scheduling. Let’s not forget that one of UConn’s wins was over Maine. Virginia, 27-24.

Boston College at Notre Dame – Remember when BC’s David Gordon kicked a field goal to beat Lou Holtz’s Fighting Irish and it felt like the Upset of the Century? Yeah. If the Eagles wanted to resurrect a series with one of its Catholic counterparts, this would have been a good year for Holy Cross. BC, 20-14.

Purdue at Michigan – How many games in a row do the Wolverines have to win before the idiots who vote in the national polls figure out they’re still one of the top 25 teams in the nation? Michigan, 20-15.

Washington at Arizona State – They’re not as fraudulent an unbeaten team as the Dallas Cowboys, but the Sun Devils still need to beat a team like the Huskies. And they will. Arizona State, 37-24.

Florida State at Wake Forest – Not so much a celebration of great defense as a monument to miserable offense. Florida State, 17-13.

Georgia Tech at Miami (Fla.) – These two programs will prove that are too many bowls by each playing in one this December. Miami, 20-17.

Colorado at Kansas State – Buffaloes showing they can win while staying at a safe distance from Miami and Maine in the arrests category. Colorado, 24-17.

Texas A&M at Texas Tech – Two schools that are still trying to figure out when the best high school football players in Texas started signing with LSU, USC and Oklahoma. Aggies still do what they do (run) better than the Red Raiders do what they do (throw). Upset special #2 Texas A&M, 38-31.

Last week: 6-8 (.429). Season: 56-31 (.644). Upset specials: 4-7 (.364)

Who beat Kalle? Deborah Blais, Lewiston (9-5); Jim Lamontagne, Auburn (8-6).