Peak foliage or something Yes, yes. The dying leaves are very pretty. Makes me want to put on one of those button-up sweaters, drink a steaming cup of pumpkin-flavored whatever, hang some dead corn on my door and talk about how, when you get right down to it, it really IS the best time of […]

Keyed up So, I got this new truck — the Nissan Titan, you may bow in worship now — but it came with just one key, so I figured I’d go have a couple new ones cut. You know, fork over five or six bucks and the nice lady will chop up some new keys […]

Crack in a bag You know what’s an abomination? Unshelled pistachios. They sell them in all the grocery stores now — they might as well sell pure heroin right there in the produce section. If you don’t have the mouth-watering, finger-bleeding agony of trying to open the shells to get at the delicious nut, your […]

A good day to castrate farm animals Hey, don’t look at me like that. This wasn’t my idea. I ain’t castrating anybody. I’m just pointing out that, according to The Farmer’s Almanac, now is a good time if you’re into this sort of thing. And let’s face it: is anything more embarrassing than performing a […]

Thinking before you speak ain’t no fun You know what else stinks about this work-from-home business? The constant threat of private moments being shared through Zoom or whatever god-forsaken technology presently has its giant eyes and ears open in your house. My wife, working from her home office in the living room, is always engaged […]