Embarrassment pro tip If you buy a GoPro adventure camera through a private seller, place it in your backpack and then walk into Walmart. It WILL set off the alarms at the doors on your way in and then again on your way out. The alarms that go WONK! WONK! WONK! And everyone will stop […]
Mark LaFlamme
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: The fight club ain't what it used to be
The brawl didn’t last any more than 20 seconds. That’s all it took for the handsome young athlete, Matt, to succumb to the hard-driving fists, elbows and knees of the brawny street punk, Steve-O, who lived in the city’s seedy south end. When it was over, Steve-O helped Matt to his feet and the two […]
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Posted inMark LaFlamme, sj-web
Mark LaFlamme: What does this smell like to you?
Roll ’em up! In the days leading up to the Fourth of July, it’s a lot of fun for the whole family to play the classic downtown game “fireworks or gunshots?” I find that in recent years, one can also have a pretty rousing good time playing “skunk or pot?” while driving through the city. […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Animal rescuers: The new rock stars
There was an unsettling moment when I thought the pterodactyl-looking creature might rear up and pluck one of the eyeballs right out of my head. Just you never mind that the pterodactyl creature was no more than three inches tall or that it seemed unable to stand on its two comically large feet. This was […]
Posted inMark LaFlamme, sj-web
Talk of the town: This is not what it looks like
Doooooooughnuts On an early evening in Kennedy Park last week, while a handful of police had gathered to keep the peace, a woman came walking through with a big box of Dunkin’ Donuts in her hand. A weird moment ensued as the officers tried to deduce whether she had brought the doughnuts for them and […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: Not today, rabies
LISBON — You’ll never hear Mr. James Ross bragging about killing the rabid fox with a meat cleaver in his kitchen. It’s a London-esque tale of quick thinking and self-preservation, but the 82-year-old isn’t crowing about it because the way he sees it, the ending is a sad one. “I’ve lived with animals all my […]
Posted inMark LaFlamme, sj-web
Talk of the town: Does this look infected to you?
You gonna eat that? Somewhere in the Twin Cities early in the week, a dude called police to report finding a piece of plastic in his box of cereal. My friend, if that hunk of plastic turns out to be the Honeycomb Cereal baking soda submarine, I will gladly trade you a Kellogg’s vintage stretchy […]
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: Looking for a graduation do-over
At every high school graduation I cover for the paper, I meet that same kid. He’s the handsome guy, chronically smiling in his cap and gown, who always has a perfect answer at the ready when I ask about his plans. “Well, tonight a bunch of us are heading to Old Orchard Beach, where we […]
Posted inMark LaFlamme, sj-web
Mark LaFlamme: International House of What, now?
Where the wild things are So at the suggestion of many of you yahoos, I went out the other day in search of the mighty multi-colored zebra that was being painted on the side of a downtown Lewiston parking garage. Unfortunately, when I started this safari, I didn’t bother to ask for a location. You […]
Posted inMark LaFlamme, sj-web
Mark LaFlamme: How would you like your eggs?
A meteorological Tilt-A-Whirl Why is it raining so much lately? Oh. Right. Smokey’s Greater Shows has come to Auburn. I’m pretty sure smart farmers plan their gardens around this carnival. Whenever it appears, you can count on a week straight of rain. Yule think I’m crazy So, I was called out by a Hannaford clerk […]