Behold, the Pink Crusader On Monday in Sabattus, a police officer was dispatched for a report of a naked man walking in the road. Why was he walking naked? Because it’s awesome this time of year, that’s why. But in this case, the man was said to be upset that roadwork had caused the closure […]
Mark LaFlamme
Posted inLewiston-Auburn, Mark LaFlamme
Street Talk: A life up in flames
The man with the sooty face stood in the dancing glow of flames and watched his home burn to the ground. He stood with his arm around the shoulders of his sobbing wife and just watched it happen. His face didn’t express much, although I could see the muscles of his jaw bulging below the […]
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Talk of the town: A journey of a thousand miles and whatnot
Hero squirrel of Idaho So, some dude’s pet squirrel thwarted a burglary by lunging out of the dark and scaring the thief into an embarrassing retreat. This is exactly why I keep three pet degus at my place – two of them are heavy into the krav maga while the third does Zumba. He’s always […]
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Street Talk: Patiently waiting for Mom Nature to rock my world
Somewhere far off, in the low-slung clouds in the eastern sky, a storm is brewing. There’s a faint rumbling that sounds like a raucous party two or three doors down. The world has darkened and trees are stirring. The birds and bugs have gone silent, and that silence is foreboding. A few fat raindrops splatter […]
Posted inMark LaFlamme
Talk of the town: Stop in the name of love
Does it bug you when I do this? Did I read somewhere that a man unleashed an army of bed bugs on a government office in Augusta? That’s way more radical than paying your taxes with pennies. I’m curious as to how he rounded them up and how he called them off once the attack […]
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Street Talk: ‘Gotcha’ policing comes to Lewiston
There was nothing much unfamiliar about the man with the sign at the corner of Lisbon and Main streets. It’s where the downtrodden go these days in hopes of collecting donations from a generous public. Seeing the man with his sad little sign, a sympathetic woman slowed to a stop with the intention of handing […]
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Street Talk: World ends; headline goes here
Someday the world is going to end and I, the Hestonesque hero left to report the tragic news, will totally choke on it. It’s not that I don’t have the skills or fortitude to write about the end of the world, mind you: “The world ended on Friday, officials said. It reportedly went with a […]
Posted inMark LaFlamme
Talk of the town: Let’s do this thing
Head games The biggest news story of the week carried headlines featuring some variation of the term “severed head.” You’d think any story with “severed head” in the headline is going to be fun, but not. Just more nonsense that was tiresome five minutes after the story broke. It’s a sad, sad day when severed […]
Posted inMark LaFlamme
Talk of the Town: Does this romper make my man bun look big?
Click it or ticket Ah, yes. It’s that time of year when police are zealously pulling you over to provide a lecture on how you’re not handling your own personal safety right. And probably a bonus fine to go with the lecture. No matter how often they do this kind of thing, I still can’t […]
Posted inMark LaFlamme
Talk of the Town: I put your pants on one leg at a time
You can now have a pet hedgehog in Maine; no permit needed A headline in last Friday’s SJ. Excellent news. I’m tired of sneaking around with my hedgehog. Getting high A photo in the Sunday paper of three men standing at the top of the Basilica spire in Lewiston made me feel dizzy. Whenever I […]